Diversity committee meeting leader: What’s the makeup of the Long Island office?
Voice on speakerphone: Two Jewish, one black, and two American.
Meeting attendee: I think she means WASP.
350 Broadway
New York, New York
Diversity committee meeting leader: What’s the makeup of the Long Island office?
Voice on speakerphone: Two Jewish, one black, and two American.
Meeting attendee: I think she means WASP.
350 Broadway
New York, New York
Temp: We found some old mice in the trashcan. I don’t really think they belong in there.
Tech guy: I think that’s a problem for facilities. Are they dead or alive?
Maryville, Tennessee
Overheard by: Cinderella
Attorney #1: Where’s Stew*?
Attorney #2: Getting Botoxed.
Attorney #1: Oh, god, not again.
1202 Kettner Boulevard
San Diego, California
Worker bee to another: Did you hear our children are going to be the first generation to be stupider than their parents?
Pharmaceutical company
New Jersey
Overheard by: Intern
Coworker #1: Was it as good as it was last night?
Coworker #2: Mmm-hmmm!
Chicago, Illinois
Recruiter: So, what do you think of her qualifications?
Manager: Well, her experience looks great. I’m just not sure what a degree in English has to do with writing?
Naval Air Station North Island
San Diego, California
Overheard by: Teresa Minnich
Boss: Wow! This adhesive is really on there!
Worker: Yes, adhesive does that.
Boss: No, but it’s really, really stuck on. It’s just like…glue, yeah. Just like glue.
Worker: Adhesive is glue.
Boss: …It is just like glue.
855 Capitolio Way
San Luis Obispo, California
Casting assistant: I knew it was already dirty, but I was half way in and it was too late to turn back.
336 West 17th Street
New York, New York
Overheard by: cubicle neighboor
Office drone: I’ll have to tickle myself for that…
Ojai, California
Overheard by: IntellectualWhore
General manager: Listen, if you guys can find a way for me to whack off another six months, that would be great.
12112 115th Avenue NE
Kirkland, Washington
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist