Archive for 2015

Though, to Be Fair, You're Not Even an Employee Here.

Male coworker: It's one o'clock already? Man, this day is flying by so fast!
Female coworker: It's dragging for me.
Male coworker: Last time I looked at the clock it was only 11 am. Man, where did the time go?
Female coworker: That's because you're old and you keep falling asleep and waking up an hour later!

Albuquerque, New Mexico

Overheard by: Janet

…Come by the Office Later and I'll Give You a Check.

Female executive VP on phone son: I'm not giving you money today. I'm not giving it to you. I'm not giving it to you. I'm not giving it to you. (pause) Michael, did you hear what I just said? I'm not giving you any money today. I'm. Not. Giving. You. Any. Money. Today. (pause) I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I said I'm sorry. (pause) Yes, I'm serious. I gave you $50 yesterday and I said it had to last you until Friday. You're 21. You're 21. Get a job. (pause) I'm not giving you money today. Okay, bye. (pause) I love you too.

Montclair, New Jersey