Archive for 2015

2PM Fill Out Questionnaire

Woman: I hate working here. It makes me want to throw my morals out the window, and become a slut.
Co-worker: A slut…There’s an image for you.
Woman: I don’t mean I want to be a slut. I just want to know what all these people are like in bed. No one small, of course.
Co-worker: So you’ll be handing out a questionnaire?

56 59 Junction
Baldwin City, Kansas

It’s Not Charity If You Don’t Mock the Recipient

Suit: When are you going to wear that neon green shirt?
Businesswoman: Oh, that shirt. He said he didn’t like it, so I looked at it and I thought, “You know what? He’s right!” It was hideous! So I went right away to that flea market place? The thrift store. Now someone else can wear it. Probably some homeless lady! Ha, ha, ha!

350 Madison Avenue
New York, NY

Actually She Details Cars, Professionally

Account manager: So I sent you that new job applicant. Have fun.
Recruiter: I just opened it up. Wow, she completely misspelled ‘Delaware State.’
Account manager: Oh, it gets worse.
Recruiter: ‘Seven years,’ with an ‘-s!’ And she spelled ‘with’ wrong!
Account manager: Yep, and she’s a detail-oriented professional.

Trolley Square
Wilmington, Delaware

Overheard by: Rhymes with Banana