Archive for March, 2015

Guess Who Wrote “Av­er­age” on the Feed­back Sheet

Fe­male cowork­er: So, how was it?
Male cowork­er: Oh my god. We put the phone on mute and talked amongst our­selves. The oth­er two peo­ple left the room, I don’t know where they are.
Fe­male cowork­er: Painful, right?
Male cowork­er: St. Patrick used that pre­sen­ta­tion to dri­ve the snakes out of Ire­land. He played it and af­ter an hour the snakes had enough.
Fe­male cowork­er: He’s the worst. I have no idea how some­one al­lows him to put his pis­tol in their hol­ster.
Male cowork­er: I like that one. I would rather beat off with a cheese grater than lis­ten to that again.

Man­hat­tan, New York

Some­times Guys Like a Lit­tle Ex­tra Fric­tion

Di­rec­tor, point­ing to pic­ture: This sis­ter? Is she old­er than you?
Em­ploy­ee: No I’m the old­est.
Di­rec­tor: She looks old­er than you. Both your sis­ters do.
Em­ploy­ee: That’s be­cause they both stopped tak­ing their es­tro­gen. They dried up.

365 W Pas­sa­ic St,
Rochelle Park, New Jer­sey

Over­heard by: Cu­bi­cle right out­side

Don’t Let Women Tell You How to Be a Man, Gen­tle­men

Male cowork­er: I’m tak­ing a Zum­ba class at the gym tonight.
Fe­male cowork­er, dead­pan: Is­n’t that what women do?
Male cowork­er, ig­nor­ing: They have this one thing where they make you link arms, and every­one is all cov­ered in sweat.
Fe­male cowork­er, still dead­pan: You’re go­ing to get ring­worm.

Bala Cyn­wyd, Penn­syl­va­nia