Office peon #1: He has a tendency not to sleep when he’s at work.
Office peon #2: That’s good, that’s good. Should we invite him for tonight?
Office peon #1: Nah.
Manila
Philippines
Overheard by: Kaye
Archive for December, 2014
Or One Of Those Fictional Places, Like in Madagascar?
Redneck high school kid checking out campus: Guantanamo Bay? Is that one of the places the bugs attack in Starship Troopers?
UT Campus
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: Flabbergasted Longhorn
You’ll Soon Be Hating Her Like the Rest Of Us Do
Boss, orienting new employee: And this is June*, our local bitch.
Los Angeles, California
Use a Spoon Like Everyone Else
Woman gazing wistfully into yogurt cup: If my tongue was long enough, I’d lick my bottom.
Knoxville, Tennessee
Overheard by: Mark
Wait until He Hears Why They’re Representing Him
Attorney reading medical report: Sue*, is this right?
Sue, the paralegal: Yup. Sure is.
Attorney: But… Why does it say ‘Christina*’ on this set of reports, and ‘Christopher’ on this set?
Sue, patting attorney on back: Read it all the way through, you’ll get it.
Attorney, from rear office five minutes later: Oh, lord… He’s… I mean, she’s… I mean… Sue? Can you come in here, please?
Sue, yelling across the office: Did you see the pictures yet?
Attorney: What?! There are pictures?! Where…? Oh, my good god! Sue!
Law office, Broadway
New York, New York
12PM Work on Budgets
Project Manager: I can’t get my numbers to balance with yours.
Budget Analyst: How much are you off by?
Project Manager: About a million.
5000 Ellin Road
Lanham, Maryland
Overheard by: Cantabile
Keeps Claiming It’s Not on Her Machine
Desktop analyst #1: She has admin on her computer! She should know how to do this!
Desktop analyst #2: Just because she has administrative rights on her computer doesn’t mean she knows how to use Google.
Houston, Texas
Blade 4: The Retirement
Loud guy in lobby: I mean, I love sharp knives a lot, but not that much. That’s just too much!
495 Metro Place South
Dublin, Ohio
Overheard by: Wondering How Much Is Too Much
He Prefers Rooms with Lots of Light
Student: I hate going to the weight room. Those weights are heavy.
School
Texas
Overheard by: dan
And the Teeth to Chew It With.
Guy #1: Man, I wish we had one of those things. You know, you put money in and food comes out?
Guy #2: Vending machine?
Guy #1: Yeah. Right.
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Scott
