Cute chick holding up ballpoint pen: How does this work?
250 Bloor Street
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: working on a manual
Archive for November, 2014
She’s Moving Very Fast
Office guy #1: Look! There goes the cocaine lady! You should try to catch her!
Office guy #2: Damn, she’s gone! Maybe next time.
Clackamas, Oregon
Overheard by: Stephanie
You Could Probably Steal One From a White Castle in the Bronx and No One Would Notice For a Week
Woman: Oh, I want the baby. I just don’t want the pregnancy. If I could just go to a fast food place and order a baby, I would.
4910 16th Street
Indianapolis, Indiana
Yet It Only Takes One Wang to Make a Right
Coworker #1: What are we getting for lunch today?
Coworker #2: Wang.
Coworker #1: Again? I'm sick of Wang.
Coworker #2: That's a lie, you never get sick of Wang.
Glastonbury, Connecticut
Overheard by: Can't wait for my contract to end
And by Nice, I Mean “How Soul-Destroyingly Gauche”
Office girl #1 in skimpy outfit gathering promotional material: You look whipped.
Office girl #2: Yeah… I had a date. I didn’t get home until four A.M.
Office girl #1: I didn’t get to sleep until four A.M., either, but that’s because I was having sex… with my man…
Office girl #2: Yeah, I was at a bar. It was the first date. We got really drunk and I rode him in the booth.
Office girl #1: Nice.
1142 Broadway
New York, New York
Overheard by: Hellooo… I am sitting right here!
But the Hottest One of Those in the Office
Biotech peon: Someone should tell her that dress makes her look like a 90-year-old Hawaiian woman. A blind, drunk 90-year-old Hawaiian woman.
York Road
Elmhurst, Illinois
4PM Maternity Leave
Worker: What’s up with Charlotte*? Is she okay?
Supervisor: I honestly don’t know.
Worker: When I was pregnant, I worked all the way up ’til I dropped the load, and then I came back. Kids these days…
1 Easton Oval
Columbus, Ohio
On the Theory That All Bad White Singers Sound Alike?
Woman from regulatory department: Herman's Hermits? Aren't they the ones that sang “Hey hey, we're The Monkees”?
Winona, Minnesota
Why Many of Us Speak Only for Our Own Amusement
Grunt: I’m sorry, Rick*. You’re gonna have to start over. I completely zoned out. I saw you standing there, and I heard you talking, and it sounded great, but…
10877 Watson Road
St. Louis, Missouri
I Don't Think That's What “Micromanagement” Means, Sir
General manager to production supervisor: You really need to come by my house after work and smell my microwave.
Dade City, Florida
Overheard by: Skip