Archive for October, 2014

And Be Miserable?

President: Thank you for coming to our annual Christmas party. Where do you work?
New guy’s new girl: I’m in private wealth management.
President: You seem very nice. Can I give you one piece of advice?
New guy’s new girl: Sure.
President: Don’t wait too long to get married and have kids.

1 Cranberry Hill
Lexington, Massachusetts

Or We Could Stop by Rite Aid for Some Gold Bond

Office lady #1, watching car accident outside: The car’s on its side.
Office lady #2: Has the fire truck come yet? I can’t see.
Office lady #3: Where are the hottie firemen?
Office lady #1: Firemen are always so cute.
Office lady #3: Who’s gonna put out the fire in my pants?
Office lady #4: Call 911.

Burbank, California

He Was Grandma’s Last Disappointment

Male coworker: So, did you hear about what Shannon* did for her grandmother’s birthday?
Female coworker: Yeah!
Male coworker: How she got her a stripper?
Female coworker: Yeah, haha. I know!
Male coworker: Pretty funny… She was, like, 90… Did you hear that she died like a week later?
Female coworker: Yeah…
Male coworker: Yeah. It kinda sucks.

Beverly Drive
Beverly Hills, California

Overheard by: Audiogirl Hates Elevators