Archive for 2012

…All the Live­long Night

Cus­tomer ser­vice rep #1: You tell that ho to take a nap and stop be­ing a bitch.
Ac­count­ing rep: Oh, stop, she’s not a ho.
Cus­tomer ser­vice rep #1: Oh, no? What oth­er job could she pos­si­bly have if she’s rolling up in­to bed at 3 am?
Fi­nance VP: Work­ing at a re­ceiver’s of­fice!
Cus­tomer ser­vice rep #2: Oh, she be re­ceivin’ al­right…

Fort Mill, South Car­oli­na


Ac­tu­al­ly…

Male cowork­er, talk­ing about re­cent trip to San An­to­nio: We want­ed to go to Sea World, but we just did­n’t have time.
Slight­ly ditzy fe­male cowork­er: There’s no Sea World in San An­to­nio.
Male cowork­er: Yes, there is.
Fe­male cowork­er: But San An­to­nio is land­locked!

Gov­ern­ment Of­fice
Wash­ing­ton, DC


…When I Was Preg­nant.

Col­lege girl: My mom ate pick­les and peanut but­ter when she was preg­nant!
Col­lege guy: Yeah, and look how you are now!
Col­lege girl: That’s be­cause I stuck a key in an elec­tric sock­et!

South­field, Michi­gan

Over­heard by: that prob­a­bly ex­plains a lot


…Wear­ing a Won­der Woman Cos­tume?

Crazy gun nut cowork­er to boss: So if a guy comes in­to our of­fice shoot­ing up the place, can I break this win­dow run to my truck and grab my gun and come back in here like a hero guy?

Mis­souri

Over­heard by: clay­ton


What What?

CSR to an­oth­er: It’s just that it’s right in the mid­dle of your butt.

Chica­go, Illi­nois