Male clerk: The water you boiled is ready. The kettle went off a couple minutes ago.
Female clerk: Oh, that's okay. It has to cool. My tea packet has told me that the water has to be at 100 degrees.

Toronto
Canadia

Overheard by: J. Oliver

Accountant to administrative assistant: Hey, is the company van available today?
Assistant: Not sure. I'll check and let you know.
Accountant: Well, I really need to know now.
Assistant: Then you should have asked sooner.

Hilton Head, South Carolina

Overheard by: Lil'

Coworker #1: When I die, I definitely want to be cremated. I don't want to wake up in a box!
Coworker #2: So you want to wake up on fire?

Hilton Head, South Carolina

Swedish girl: Danish people have the worst accent. It's almost as bad as Finnish.

London
England

Overheard by: Clare

Sales manager on phone: Hey, can you send me a better scan of your drivers' license? I can't see the picture in this, it's just black. (pause) Yes, I know you're black, but I'm sure you have eyes and a nose and a mouth, and I would love to see what those look like.

Fort Mill, South Carolina

Manager: We should sell you on the black market.
Ditzy carhop: Is that black people?

Festus, Missouri

Woman yelling into phone at IT support person: My problem is I do not go out on the internet!

Washington, DC

Overheard by: OldPandaDayz

Peon #1: How long has it been since the last site visit?
Peon #2: It's been several hours and 15 days…

Portland, Oregon

Secretary to sales: Here, feel my clementine.

Mustang, Oklahoma

Overheard by: Orange you glad he didn't say banana?

Female coworker #1: The package has arrived!
Female coworker #2: Yes! Finally we can get her!
Female coworker #1: I'll hold her down and you shave her legs, okay?
Female coworker #2: Yeah! Tonight we'll do it!
Female coworker #3, clueless: What?

Milan
Italy