Archive for April, 2011

You Smell Like Gas.

Cowork­er #1: I was putting gas in the car and the noz­zle just sprayed out of the gas tank and all over me. If some­one were to light a match, I’d go up in flames. (dis­ap­pears for a short time to change in­to a pair of jeans)
Cowork­er #2, not hav­ing heard the pre­vi­ous sto­ry: Oh my gosh, are you wear­ing jeans?
Cowork­er #1: Yep.
Cowork­er #2: Why?
(cowork­er #1 pro­ceeds to retell the gas-spilling sto­ry)
Cowork­er #2: Oh my gosh, do your oth­er pants smell like gas?
Cowork­er #1, very se­ri­ous­ly: Nope, they smell like lemons.

Ply­mouth, Min­neso­ta

Al­ways a Nice Day for a Weird Wed­ding

Asian of­fice girl: Yeah, my wed­ding is go­ing to be a West­ern wed­ding and not a tra­di­tion­al Chi­nese one.
Blonde of­fice girl: (silent and per­plexed)
Asian of­fice girl, notic­ing the con­fu­sion: Like, West­ern cul­tur­al­ly. Not like cow­boy-and-In­di­ans West­ern, you know.
Blonde of­fice girl: Ohh­hh, okay! I was to­tal­ly gonna say that would be a re­al­ly weird wed­ding!

Los An­ge­les, Cal­i­for­nia

Over­heard by: sur­round­ed by id­iots