Archive for 2010

On­ly to a Straight One, Like Ted Hag­gard.

Of­fice drone #1: Is there any mon­ey left for this?
Gay man­ag­er: No. Well, there’s some mon­ey, but I can’t give it all to you.
Of­fice drone #1: Well, we need more.
Gay man­ag­er: Well, you can’t have more. I’ll give you half, okay?
Of­fice drone #1: God, you are such a tight ar­se.
Of­fice drone #2, in pan­ic: You can’t say that to a gay ho­mo­sex­u­al!

South Morang
Aus­tralia

Over­heard by: Straight and amused.

A Lit­tle Tip from Us to You: If They Think You’re Jew­ish Any­way, Take Those Hol­i­days Off.

In­di­an woman: How was your hol­i­day?
White man: Uh, hol­i­day?
In­di­an woman: Yeah, Rosh­er Hana?
White man: Rosh Hashanah?
In­di­an woman: Yeah.
White man: I’m not Jew­ish.
In­di­an woman: Oh, you’re not?
White man: No. I told you that when you asked me how Passover was.
In­di­an woman: (si­lence)
White man: That’s okay. That was awhile ago.

At­lanta, Geor­gia

Sigh.

IT guy #1: Hey, Ted*, I’m gonna start fix­ing some of these prob­lems in your box.
IT guy #2: You know, I’ve been do­ing pret­ty well get­ting through them. With that new tool.
IT guy #3: Yeah, that new tool is great! It lets me plow through those new hires quick­er than be­fore! I don’t know how it works, but they go. Crazy for it!

Sparks, Mary­land

Over­heard by: Hel­lo, Op­er­a­tor…