Coworker: It was so good I licked my box!
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: confused but amused
Archive for 2010
Like Texas, a Good Idea That Turned Out Poorly
Coworker to admin: Might sound weird, and I never thought I'd have to say this, but you look pretty good as a zombie.
McKinney, Texas
…And Let's Not Even Talk About the Stapler-Spoon.
Cubicle rat, in loud voice: Hey, where were you when I needed a knife? I had to use a key!
St. Louis, Missouri
Overheard by: durp
…And No One Even Applauded!
Guy in cubicle: I seemed to have dropped my camera in the toilet.
Baltimore, Maryland
Wanna Feel??
Office lady #1: How do you feel?
Office lady #2: I've had this hard spot right here and then I have this really hard spot over here.
Office lady #1: No?
Office lady #2: And the really hard spot is moving towards my crotch!
Office lady #1: That sucks.
Miami, Florida
Overheard by: DeeDee
The Camera Hates You
Photographer during photo shoot: Wow! We're really gonna need to Photoshop you!
Denver, Colorado
Jay-Z Has a Reasonable Doubt About Beyoncé
Paralegal: So I ripped her arm off.
Lawyer #1: Wait. What part do I get?
Paralegal: You get her leg.
Lawyer #2: Just don't leave her booty behind.
Indiana
Overheard by: I think I'll be leaving now.
I Was Dragged Out Of the Womb Kicking and Screaming
20-something woman to 50-something coworker: If you didn't want to be so old, you shouldn't have been born so long ago.
Melbourne
Australia
Okay, $10
Female CSR, holding potted plant: Jack*, can you feel this for me?
Male CSR, with back turned, joking: Sure, for $20!
Female CSR: Do you think it's moist enough?
Bedford, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Pegmeister
And Don't Start With Me About Beam Lube
Female architect to male engineer: I don't care about the size of your beam, it's not going to fit in this space I have!
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Office temp