Boss to subordinate: Hey, you should come back to my place for a big load!
Newmarket
Ontario
Canadia
Archive for July, 2010
Also Good Advice for Prison.
Employee to another, giving advice on batting stance: Yeah, you wanna stay straight. No, you don't wanna bend over.
Nashville, Tennessee
Well What's Wrong with Rounding?
Service rep: The program was running, and it sends about one e-mail a second.
Customer: Okay, I think it was going for about five minutes, so it sent 800 e-mails.
Service rep: Um… Not really… No.
Ontario
Canadia
We're All Looking Forward to Tomorrow
Coworker, about performance reviews: That's where the managers are. In the conference room with their people, doing it.
Tacoma, Washington
Overheard by: Wish I was a manager
The Current State Of Our Economy: Explained.
Sales rep: I'm rich today because I decided not to pay my car payment this month. Suck it, bank!
St. Paul, Minnesota
Overheard by: srsly
…Thus Fulfilling My Lifelong Dream.
Coworker, about new Twitter follower: Never mind, I thought it was a hooker.
Amarillo, Texas
Overheard by: Gina
How Irish Families Bond.
Coworker, on taking kids to get flu shots: When I took them, they were great. They only cried a little. My daughter said, “daddy, I feel safer doing shots with you.”
Grapevine, Texas
Best. Jenny Craig Ad. Ever.
Secretary: Are you gonna have a little bambino?
Slightly overweight patient: Uh, no. Just had a few too many cookies.
Secretary: Are you sure? Maybe I know something you don't.
Slightly overweight patient: I am unable to conceive.
Rochester, New York
And Maybe You Could Spruce It Up a Bit?
Art director to photographer: So, how big is your rack?
(rest of table bursts out laughing)
Art director: Okay! I guess we're all 13 here!
Photographer: You gotta admit, that was good.
Art director: Yeah, it was good.
(at the end of photo shoot meeting)
Art director: Don't forget to bring your rack on Friday!
Van Nuys, California
Maybe We Should Do Work at Some Point?
Male coworker: Who was the other guy in CHIPS? Not Erik Estrada, the other one.
Female coworker: It was officer Johnathan Baker and… Arthur Poncharelli?
Glastonbury, Connecticut
Overheard by: James Logan