Office girl #1: Obviously, I just brewed coffee, right? So of course she has to be the first to get some. Well, I walk into the kitchen and she's facing the freezer with the freezer door open, and she has the coffee pot up to her nose, and she's smelling it. I have no idea what the hell was going on.
Office girl #2: What the eff?
Office girl #1: Yeah… I'm thinking that maybe… No, no, I really have no idea.
Sacramento, California
Office manager: So, what's beeping down here?
Maintenance guy: Well, we think it's the fire alarm. But we're not sure…
Nashville, Tennessee
Overheard by: cubegirl
African-American CSR to team manager: Sir, this customer says that he wants to speak to someone else. He says he doesn't want to talk with a “nigger.”
Team manager: Ask him how he feels about talking to a gay Asian man.
Round Rock, Texas
Customer: How do you guys get to New York? Like, which flights do I have to get on?
Ticket agent: (explains routes, flight numbers, arrival times, etc.)
Customer: Okay. I'd like a ticket to Chicago, please.
Edmonton International Airport
Canadia
Overheard by: Amused Agent
Office girl: Praise god! Prayer works!
Born again Christian coworker: Hell yeah!
Office girl: Huh?
Born again Christian coworker: Sorry.
Aiea, Hawaii
Overheard by: Girl hiding behind her monitor
Photographer #1: It doesn't need to be sucked that hard.
Photographer #2: Yes, it does.
Photographer #3: I am more about friction then suction.
Studio
Culver City, California
Supervisor: How was the soup the clients brought?
Worker: Didn't you get any?
Supervisor: I had a lot of work and by the time I got there it was sublimed.
Worker: “Sublimed”?
Supervisor: Yeah, I used the wrong word. That happens a lot when I'm stressed off.
Culver City, California
Boss to office: I don't even want you guys, I just want pets.
Berkeley, California
Worker bee #1: If only the sheets weren't green…
Counselor: Maybe blue sheets?
Worker bee #2: What's wrong with green? They've been green sheets for years! You could leave tomorrow and we'd be stuck with pink sheets!
Worker bee #1: No, I don't like pink, they wouldn't be pink. Also, where am I going?
Worker bee #2: I don't know!
(pause)
Worker bee #1: Maybe something sassy…
Counselor: Well, I'm feeling lightheaded now.
Greensboro, North Carolina
Overheard by: student worker
Manager: So, you're still doing the panda.
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: Animal Lover