Archive for 2009

…Which Is to Serve Me.

Grad stu­dent #1: Dude, don’t get de­fen­sive, but we all have a the­o­ry that you’re go­ing to snap like that guy from Yale.
Grad stu­dent #2: What?! I’m noth­ing like that guy!
Grad stu­dent #1: But you’re a con­trol freak, and you have anger is­sues.
Grad stu­dent #2: I’m not a con­trol freak! I just get pissed off at peo­ple when they don’t do what they’re sup­posed to!

Uni­ver­si­ty Park, Penn­syl­va­nia

Gay Folks Are So Anx­ious to Get to the Al­tar

Gay cowork­er to fe­male cowork­er in white dress: You look so “sac­ri­fi­cial vir­gin” to­day.
Fe­male cowork­er: Um… Thank you?
Gay cowork­er, whis­per­ing: What kind of fab­ric is that?
Fe­male cowork­er, whis­per­ing: Cot­ton.
Gay cowork­er: It looks fun.

Char­lotte, North Car­oli­na

…At Length, If Nec­es­sary

Man­ag­er: So Mike* is leav­ing.
Of­fice pe­on #1: Will any­one no­tice? What does he do, any­way?
Of­fice pe­on #2: He’s a fluffer.
Of­fice pe­on #1: What?!
Of­fice pe­on #2: What? He, y’­know, fluffs out his job so it looks like he’s do­ing more than he is.
Man­ag­er to of­fice pe­on #1: Af­ter the meet­ing, you ex­plain.

Bris­bane
Aus­tralia

Over­heard by: Ear­ley­DaysYet