Archive for 2008

Yes, But Things Move Slow­er in the South

Ship­ping clerk: What time is it in Vir­ginia? Are they ahead of us or be­hind us?
Ship­ping man­ag­er: They’re to the right of us.
Ship­ping clerk: Huh?
Ship­ping man­ag­er: Vir­ginia is on the East Coast. The same east that the sun ris­es on.
Ship­ping clerk (af­ter some thought): Okay, so it’s ear­li­er there?
Ship­ping man­ag­er: No, it’s lat­er by one hour.
Ship­ping clerk (af­ter a lit­tle more thought): How can it be lat­er in Vir­ginia if the sun is still ris­ing there? It’s been up here for a few hours now!

Des Moines, Iowa

Scoo­by-Doo: Ruh-Roh, Rag­gy!

Four-year-old boy: Mom…mom, I have to go pot­ty.
Mom: Okay… Just a minute.
Four-year-old boy: Mom… Mom…I have to gooooo.
Mom: Okay…I said in just a minute.
Grand­moth­er (stand­ing up): I’ll take him.
Mom: That’s okay, I’ll take him.
(grand­moth­er turns away to sit down)
Four-year-old boy: Mom, I just got­ta go to!
Mom: Okay hon­ey… Just hold it for one sec­ond!
Four-year-old boy: Hold what?

Mex­i­can Restau­rant
Huntsville, Al­aba­ma

Over­heard by: Mel­o­nia S

Like My Cat

Cowork­er #1: Yes, I am so sick of this dog… and I haven’t even tak­en it home yet.
Cowork­er #2: Wait un­til it starts pee­ing and poop­ing all over the place. Pup­pies do that un­til you get them trained.
Cowork­er #1: I wish it could just watch a tape and be trained.

Riv­er Road
Con­shohock­en, Penn­syl­va­nia