Archive for 2008

The Liars Are Our Clients

Five-year-old boy, visiting dad’s law firm: I wish I could work here. One day, I’m gonna become a liar so I can work here.
Father: ‘Lawyer.’ It’s pronounced lawyer.

Washington, DC

Overheard by: amco

I Got That Ages Ago

Mom: Oooh, guess what I got while I was in Atlanta yesterday?
Daughter, faking excitement: Herpes?!
Mom: No, I got– Wait, what?!

Mall
Georgia

Overheard by: P-Nuckle

Everybody Knows It’s “I-N-N-E-R-N-E-T”

Employee #1, looking at intranet option of business transactions menu: Hey, look! Heh. These morons spelled ‘Internet’ wrong on this menu.
Employee #2: No, they didn’t.
Employee #1: Yes, they did. See?
Employee #2: No, an intranet is different than the Internet. It’s sort of like a private version of the Internet for corporations and organizations.
Employee #1: Oh, seriously? Damn, look at you, making me feel all stupid and shit. I’ve never heard of that before in my life. I bet you’re the only one here who knows that. Look, I’ll prove it to you. [Calls boss over.] Look, they spelled ‘Internet’ wrong on this menu.
Boss: Oh, I know! Isn’t it funny? Yeah, those morons at corporate can’t spell!

Hackensack, New Jersey