Archive for 2008

The Liars Are Our Clients

Five-year-old boy, vis­it­ing dad’s law firm: I wish I could work here. One day, I’m gonna be­come a liar so I can work here.
Fa­ther: ‘Lawyer.’ It’s pro­nounced lawyer.

Wash­ing­ton, DC

Over­heard by: am­co

I Got That Ages Ago

Mom: Oooh, guess what I got while I was in At­lanta yes­ter­day?
Daugh­ter, fak­ing ex­cite­ment: Her­pes?!
Mom: No, I got– Wait, what?!

Mall
Geor­gia

Over­heard by: P‑Nuckle

Every­body Knows It’s “I‑N-N-E-R-N-E‑T”

Em­ploy­ee #1, look­ing at in­tranet op­tion of busi­ness trans­ac­tions menu: Hey, look! Heh. These mo­rons spelled ‘In­ter­net’ wrong on this menu.
Em­ploy­ee #2: No, they did­n’t.
Em­ploy­ee #1: Yes, they did. See?
Em­ploy­ee #2: No, an in­tranet is dif­fer­ent than the In­ter­net. It’s sort of like a pri­vate ver­sion of the In­ter­net for cor­po­ra­tions and or­ga­ni­za­tions.
Em­ploy­ee #1: Oh, se­ri­ous­ly? Damn, look at you, mak­ing me feel all stu­pid and shit. I’ve nev­er heard of that be­fore in my life. I bet you’re the on­ly one here who knows that. Look, I’ll prove it to you. [Calls boss over.] Look, they spelled ‘In­ter­net’ wrong on this menu.
Boss: Oh, I know! Is­n’t it fun­ny? Yeah, those mo­rons at cor­po­rate can’t spell!

Hack­en­sack, New Jer­sey