Archive for 2007

We’re in a Roaring Metal Tube Full of Idiots — It Couldn’t Hurt

Flight attendant #1: I used to get high before studying for tests. Did you ever try it?
Flight attendant #2: No, no, I never did that.
Flight attendant #1: It really works… Hey, did you study the new rules for flights shorter than two hours? Lots of information.
Flight attendant #2: Are you high right now?
Flight attendant #1: … Why do you ask?

United flight
Nebraska

Overheard by: Ken

Oh, and Smallpox Victims!

Boss: Oh, you met Beth* from the London office? How old did she look?
Woman on phone: Oh, well, she looked older than me, so she must in her 50s. Then again, sometimes people look older than me, but they turn out to be only 35.
Boss: Cigarette smokers.
Woman on phone: … And meth addicts.

Sears Tower
Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: 22 and never doing meth

And I’m Going to Be Completely Rigid about This

Old maid boss: Do you have a boner over there?
Young male worker, confused: I’m sorry, what?
Old maid boss: A boner. For folding paper [holds up knife]. Do you have one?
Young male worker: How can you seriously be calling it that? I know you know what that means.
Old maid boss: No, I know you need one if you don’t have one. I’ll get another one.
Young male worker: I know you know what that means. I know you know what that means. I don’t want anything to do with it.

6101 O’Connell Avenue
Colorado Springs, Colorado

Overheard by: TK