Coworker #1: I wonder who’ll get the Pfizer account…
Coworker #2: I hope I do! I love reading about erections!
Fort Point
Boston, Massachusetts
Archive for July, 2007
It’s a Free-Range Office
Client: Is it North or South of Route 24?
Manager: Well, that depends on where you’re coming from.
Client: Oh, really? How does that work?
Huntington, New York
He Sent Pictures, See?
Assistant checking weather online: Ohhh! Derek* got 12 inches yesterday!
Cube rat: I’m sorry, what did you say?
Assistant: He got 12 inches!
8220 England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
I’m Way Better at It Than Jack Is
Coworker: Don’t close my door. Jack* and I like to communicate.
Jack: What’d you say?
Williamsburg, Virginia
Unlike These Ammunition Rounds, Which Are Totally Still Live
X-ray machine attendant, picking stuffed panda up off belt: This one’s dead… He didn’t make it through the machine.
Airport
Los Angeles, California
In Fairness, the Hanger Had One of Those Foam Covers
Social worker: Honestly, what parent in their right mind hands a toddler who is just learning to walk a wire hanger as a chew toy in goodwill and thinks it’s a good idea?
Medical Center
Salt Lake City, Utah
Overheard by: makin a difference
Avast, Ye Lubber!
Lieutenant: You work for a law enforcement agency, not a pirate ship!
Employee with sideburns: Sir?
Columbus Avenue
Boston, Massachusetts
The Art of the Blue Job
Painting professor: I paint for people who look at art. Like, my mom will look at this and go, ‘Oh, I like the blue.’ And I don’t have to explain to my mother that this is actually about some weird sex thing I did.
Providence, Rhode Island
When Good Deeds Become Career-Limiting
HR clerk: Excuse me, ma’am, but it appears that you have something stuck in your pantyhose on your left leg.
Visiting manager’s wife: I’m not wearing pantyhose!
5760 East Highway 80
Pearl, Mississippi
Overheard by: Brain Dancing
But at Least You’ve Stopped Throwing Your Cat Up into Trees
Scientist at desk to tech in lab: Just because you want to see hot firemen doesn’t mean you have to set off the alarm!
20925 Crossroads Circle
Waukesha, Wisconsin