Archive for April, 2007

Why Josie Spoiled in the Heat

Chick #1: Sometimes when I’m not wearing a bra and I don’t want my nipples to poke out I put Band-Aids over them.
Chick #2: You put mayonnaise on your nipples?!
Chick #1: Yeah, Band-Aids.
Chick #2: Mayonnaise?!
Chick #1: Yeah, Band-Aids.

9th and Broad Street
Chattanooga, Tennessee

And the Surgical Interventions

Client: I can’t wait to get back to my car!
Hair stylist #1: Why your car?
Client: So I can take my bra off!
Hair stylist #2: Girl, my boobs will never sag, ’cause I’m a hairdresser!
Hair stylist #1: Huh?
Hair stylist #2: It’s all the blow drying!

West End
Nashville, Tennessee

Overheard by: wondering if my boobs will sag

As It Is, My Thighs Are Badly Chafed

Coworker #1: I saw you on the train this morning. You should have sat with me.
Coworker #2: Why didn’t you say hello when we got off?
Coworker #1: You were, like, speed racer walking towards the building, and I waddle. Waddlers can only move so fast, and I had maxed out.

Long Island, New York

Overheard by: A Fellow Waddler