Archive for 2006

5PM That’s a Wrap

Boss: What are you still do­ing here? I told you to go home ear­ly.
Em­ploy­ee: I know. Have you ever seen Shaw­shank Re­demp­tion?
Boss: Yes.
Em­ploy­ee: Re­mem­ber what hap­pened to the pris­on­er that fi­nal­ly got his free­dom? He end­ed up hang­ing him­self be­cause he did­n’t know what to do with his free time.

440 9th Av­enue
New York, NY

12PM Find New In­tern

Work­er #1: Yeah, maybe he was­n’t the best in­tern.
Work­er #2: How was I sup­posed to know he’d go off his meds?
Work­er #1: He sure did love open­ing mail, though.
Work­er #2: Yeah. He sure did love open­ing mail.

270 Lafayette Street
New York, NY

9AM Back to Work

Co-work­er #1: Who was in the bath­room just a minute ago?
Co-work­er #2: I don’t know.
Co-work­er #1: Some­one was in there tak­ing a dump, and I could see un­der the stall that he had his shoes off.
Co-work­er #2: Wait, like bare­foot?
Co-work­er #1: Well, with his socks on. Who would take their shoes off, though?
Co-work­er #3: I don’t know, but I think I might start do­ing that. Not a bad idea!

712 South Mc­Clin­tock Dri­ve
Tempe, Ari­zona

11AM Pay Bills

Cus­tomer: I want to pay my bill. I know it’s two months over­due, so I
want­ed to come and pay it in per­son.
Cus­tomer Ser­vice: Ac­cord­ing to our records they shut off your ca­ble to­day.
Cus­tomer: But they said I had un­til to­day to pay the bill.
Cus­tomer Ser­vice: Well, your ca­ble has been shut off to­day.
Cus­tomer: But to­day’s not over yet!
Cus­tomer Ser­vice: It is for you.

11020 Flat­lands Av­enue
Brook­lyn, New York

Over­heard by: Paul