Archive for 2006

5PM That’s a Wrap

Trim middle-aged President: I just received my soccer badge in the mail.
Young receptionist: I can’t see you playing soccer.
President: I don’t play, I referee.
Receptionist: Still, I can’t see your fat ass waddling up and down the field.

150 Batson Drive
Manchester, Connecticut

Overheard by: now I’m going to have to answer the phones again

4PM Calling IT

Worker: There is something wrong with my computer. It is really
slow… I mean really slow. It is like having a conversation with Keanu Reeves.

26 Arrowsmith Road
Hamilton, Ontario

3PM Tea Run

Admin #1: Without extremes, normalcy wouldn’t exist.
Admin #2: Wow, we’re getting heavy now.
Admin #3: Back from tour one day, and you’re already waxing poetic?
Admin #1: Wait, isn’t that what fractals and Jurassic Park are about?
Admin #2 & 3: What?
Admin #1: Extremes, fractals and Jurassic Park. Wasn’t anyone a nerd like me?
Admin #2: Um, no.

3 Lafayette Avenue
Brooklyn, New York

1PM Customer Visit

Customer: I don’t understand why you can’t keep up with production.
Program manager: You aren’t following the rules. You are running twice the daily quoted volumes.
Customer: But we are still under the yearly volumes. You just need to plan better.
Program manager: I can’t just shit capacity out of my ass!

5540 Parque Industrial
Ciudad Juarez, Mexico