Scared CSR: Someone just blew up the bathroom!
Marshall Street
Richmond, Virginia
Archive for the ‘Violence’ Category
Unless He’s in a Small, Enclosed Space — That’s Where He Does His Suicide and His Hurting
Grunt on phone: I have claustrophobia and am not suicidal. I am not going to hurt anybody.
1400 Douglas Street
Omaha, Nebraska
Overheard by: DB
Hot!
Professor: Whoever taught you to write like this should be flogged with your severed writing arm.
Houston, Texas
So Drive Around That Girl Scout Troop
Photographer: Well, you don't want to get blood all over your car…
Newspaper
Delaware
Some Lives May Be Better Unexamined
Canadian arborist: Check it out. I can streamline the camera in the town square back at home in Brandon. I called my dad and told him to drive by and wave. Sometimes, if you watch long enough, you can see someone crash.
Westchester, New York
I Should Write a Haiku About This
Employee: I think I'm too aggressive.
Manager: It's like you have vomit of the mouth. I mean diarrhea of the mouth. Which I guess is like vomit of the butt.
Dallas, Texas
She Should Enter a Neck-Wringing Competition and Win Money for Food
HR supervisor on phone: He called me the other day all worried because she was running out of food. I told him: she has all those animals and she likes to wring their necks…
Fontana, California
Overheard by: Aeirlys
Is That, Like, a Sex Euphemism?
Coworker to another: How was your weekend?
Another: Not good, we lost another pet. The rabbit was murdered by a sheep.
New Zealand
Overheard by: George
You've Always Struck Me As More Of a Swallower
Supervisor to staff member: Leave me alone or I will spit my nastiness on you.
Mclean, Virginia
With My Dreds
Admin: You need a haircut.
Service guy: I need to go club some baby seals.
Irvine, California
Overheard by: i just answer the phone…