Manager: Go home every day and watch Dukes of Hazzard. Problem solved.
Friendly’s Ice Cream
Convent Station, New Jersey
Archive for the ‘TV’ Category
Drop a Bunch Of Condoms on the Floor, and He’ll Immediately Tell You How Many There Are
Secretary: So, what’s her husband like?
Manager: Oh, he’s kind of like Mr Bean…you think he may be slightly autistic but he’s still really sexually attractive.
Secretary: Uhh…
Office
Sydney
Australia
And Son of Sam Was a Dr. Seuss Character?
Smart girl: Okay, that guy was nice but really kind of creepy.
Girl: Yeah, but he seemed harmless enough.
Smart girl: Sure, but so did Ted Bundy.
Girl: Oh I love that guy!
Smart girl: Wait… what?
Girl: He’s the one on Married with Children, right?
Omaha, Nebraska
Overheard by: glad my gf is the smart one
They Couldn’t Find Enough Four-Fingered Actors for the Live-Action Version
Coworker #1: How was The Simpsons Movie?
Coworker #2: Pretty good.
Coworker #1: It’s not the cartoon version, is it?
Coworker #2: Uhh… Yeah.
Navy Yard
Washington, DC
What’s Less Cute Than a Man Who Used to Be a Cute Boy?
Aspiring movie critic #1: I don’t think Zac Efron will ever be able to do anything but High School Musical.
Aspiring movie critic #2: I know. He’ll be like…the gym teacher in High School Musical 30.
Richmond, Virginia
I Watch It Through a Hole in My Bible
Nurse to another: Do you watch the show where all the scientists live together? Oh you don’t watch tv at night? That’s show’s ungodly sinful… But I do like Six Feet Under.
University of Kentucky Hospital
Lexington, Kentucky
If Ever There Were a Need for a Longer Pause…
Cube dweller: Hey Liz*, wanna hear something crazy?
Liz*: Sure.
Cube dweller: That stock I bought is up 900% today.
Liz*: Which stock?
Cube dweller: That gay stock I bought! 900%!
Liz*: Gay stock…?
Cube dweller: Yeah–that gay tv network stock. I knew it! Gay tv, yes!
Liz*: Well, good for you…
Cube dweller: Man, my butt is so sore today…
Warren, Michigan
Overheard by: Your what is sore?!
…Or Any False Gods, Really
Employee #1: Did you see Idol last night?
Employee #2: Sorry, I don’t watch Idol.
Employee #1: James got put off!
Employee #2: I don’t watch Idol.
Manhattan, New York
Poland? Absolutely.
Boss to office: It’s like being on Wheel of Fortune without having to buy a vowel.
Chicago, Illinois
…As I Argued in My Doctoral Dissertation
Guy #1: Do you remember GizmoDuck?
Guy #2: Yeah! He was like the Iron Man of the duck world.
Nashville, Tennessee
Overheard by: Clair
