One of the Olsen Twins, Perhaps

Lady suit, at lunch: How is it?
Male suit: It needs something.
Lady suit: Perhaps you should have asked for a more aggressive vegetable.

9^th Street and Main Avenue
Durango, Colorado

Oh Wait, It’s Just Models Sharing a New York Apartment

Weird suit: Hey! There’s a box of dead people back here!

Bourse Building
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Because Our Country Can’t Handle a Cool Whip

Suit to other: I just don’t understand why the minority whip is never a minority.

Denver, Colorado

5PM That’s a Wrap

Suit #1: Are you going to the farewell party for [Liz]?
Suit #2: I don’t know yet. Does she know she’s leaving or is it a surprise party?

3 2^nd Street
Jersey City, New Jersey

Overheard by: Hobo Whisperer

This Is My Concerned Face.

Lady suit: Well, if she is suicidal, she shouldn’t be traveling alone…
Male suit, staring into distance: Mmm-hmmm.
Lady suit: … Or drinking alone…
Male suit, staring into distance: Mmm-hmmm.

Penn Station
New York, New York

Overheard by: passerby

Stupid Twenty-First Century

Suit #1: The RFA for the ‘o’9-‘o’10 year are…
Suit #2: “O’9-‘o’10?” You mean “ ‘o’9 – 10.“
Suit #1: There is another zero in 2010.
Boss: Yeah, ‘o’9 – 10’o’!
Suit #1 & #2: “10’o”?!
Boss: What? Isn’t that right?
Suit #2: No, he meant double ‘o’9 and ‘o’10.
Suit #1: I hate my life.

Lincoln, Nebraska

Overheard by:

Wallace Is Organized to a Fault

Meeting chairperson: Alright, that’s about all for this Monday’s meeting. Now, is anyone going to be away on vacation at all this week?
Suit #1: I’ll be taking next Monday off. We’re heading up to the cottage for the weekend.
Suit #2: Umm, I will be sick on Friday so I won’t be in.

Meadowvale Business Park
Mississauga, Ontario
Canadia

The New Zagat Guide Is Edgier Than Ever

Middle-aged female suit: Yeah, that place has pretty good sandwiches. Plus, there’s someone there I want to fuck.

Colonial Place Office Building
Arlington, Virginia

For Murphy, It’s Skywriters or Nothing

Suit: It’s been a big thing. I’ve sent a bunch of emails about it.
Boss: Yeah, I’ve ignored them. Sorry.

Los Angeles, California

Overheard by: It’s not my project

That’s Not Baggage — Those Are Wedding Gifts

Suit hanging up phone: I am so done with married chicks — they have too much baggage.

3250 42^nd Street
New York, New York