Archive for the ‘Students’ Category

Oh No, My PayPal Account Is Empty! How Will I Pay This Strapping Young IT Guy?

Tech guy: I need to update your microscope software, have you seen the dongle?
Grad student: Um… Excuse me?
Tech guy: I need to plug the dongle in to get access to your machine.
Grad student: Uh… What would… That… Look like?
Tech guy: Oh wait, never mind, I see it. Thanks!
[Tech guy leaves.]Grad student, to undergrad nearby: What the hell was he talking about?
Undergrad: I don’t know, but I feel like we were about ten seconds away from being in a very nerdy porno.

North Charles Street
Baltimore, Maryland

Overheard by: LabCat

The Ballerinas Decide to Go to America

Bimbette: Hey, remember the time we broke the toilet?
Blonde: Yeah, stuff like that happens to us.
Bimbette: I wonder what will happen to us next…
Blonde: Let’s have a threesome with someone famous!
Bimbette: With who?
Blonde: A Beatle… John Lennon?
Bimbette: Duh, he’s in America!
Blonde: Duh, he’s dead!
Bimbette: Yeah, but he’s still in America.

St. Kilda Road
Melbourne, Australia

Overheard by: Same Cubicle, Different Pair

And for My Presentation, I’ll Be Performing ‘Bop Gun’

Third grader: Hey, for our project do we gotta write about a black person?
Teacher: No, you don’t have to write about a black person.
Third grader: My mom wants me to write about George Clinton.
Teacher: Do you mean Bill Clinton?
Third grader: Nah, I meant Thomas Jefferson.
Teacher: Oh, he’s okay.

7th Street & Sansom Street
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Teacher Noga

How Nice Of Mr. Hefner to Loan One Out

Grad student: A few months ago she said it was national bring-your-bunny-to-work day– which I'm pretty sure she made up…so when I walked by her cube she had the bunny in a makeshift fort between her purse and some binders. And the next time I walked by, eight members of the senior staff were sitting in a circle on the floor playing with the bunny in the middle.

Arlington, Virginia

Overheard by: Intern