Archive for the ‘Sports’ Category

And I Was Like, “Mis­sion Ac­com­plished!”

Fe­male cowork­er #1: By that time I was drunk enough to run in there my­self. So I bought one of ’em. It was like a reg­u­lar con­dom, but it had these lit­tle pink things…
Fe­male cowork­er #2: You bought a french tick­ler?
Fe­male cowork­er #1: Yeah! So we blew it up at our ta­ble and start­ed us­ing it as a vol­ley­ball. It was re­al­ly fun for a while, and then I spiked it in­to the priest’s head and we were asked to leave the re­cep­tion.

Al­bany, New York

Over­heard by: Dou­bled over Cowork­er

Should I Start Re­fer­ring to Yeast In­fec­tions As “In­fil­tra­tion of the De­fen­sive Line”?

Fe­male cowork­er #1: I’m sure *Mark hates be­ing the on­ly guy on these smoke breaks; es­pe­cial­ly when we start talk­ing about our vagi­na is­sues.
Fe­male cowork­er #2: That’s how I feel when y’all talk about foot­ball. Foot­ball is my vagi­na.

Sex Toy Com­pa­ny
Las Ve­gas, Neva­da

Over­heard by: Sex Writer God­dess

Yet They All Know Who Kendra Is. *Shud­der*

Of­fice girl #1: Did you hear that Kendra’s man is­n’t on the Ea­gles any­more?
Of­fice girl #2: They fired him?
Of­fice girl #1: Hold on, let me check. (pause) Oh, nope. He’s go­ing to play for the Colts now.
Of­fice girl #2: Where’s that?
Of­fice girl #1: I’m not sure.
Of­fice girl #2: It sounds like it’s some­where cold.
Of­fice girl #1: I have no clue.
Of­fice girl #2: I’ll google it. (pause) In­di­anapo­lis.
Of­fice girl #1: Where’s that?
Of­fice girl #2: I don’t know. I think that’s north of here.
Of­fice girl #1: Oh…
Of­fice girl #2: Oh, it’s in In­di­ana.

Mor­gan­town, West Vir­ginia

Over­heard by: hum­ble of­fice drone