Office chick #1: Have you seen the weather today?
Office chick #2: 100% chance of gayness today.
Burlington, Massachusetts
Overheard by: tater
Archive for the ‘Sexuality’ Category
…If You Lost About 30 Pounds.
50-something man: Well, I have to tell you: for a woman in her 50s, you still look great.
50-something woman, flattered: Yeah?
50-something man: Oh, yeah. If we weren't both married, and you didn't work for me, I'd definitely try to nail ya.
Westbury, New York
Overheard by: Big Larry
A Whacking Big Problem
Worried secretary: Joe has a problem with the masturbation story.
Congress Avenue
Delray Beach, Florida
2PM Waiting Room
Girl #1: I use the pull and pray method.
Girl #2: Girl, pull and pray…they never do it. It doesn’t work.
Girl #1: Yes it does! It just doesn’t work ninety percent of the time.
45 Broadway
New York, New York
Overheard by: not dating either of them
Cigarette, Anyone?
CEO wrapping up a video conference: I just want to thank everyone for making this the best three-way I’ve ever had!
Traverse City, Michigan
Overheard by: Admin Assistant K
I Don't See Much Market for a Pants Cam, Though
Guy in cubicle on phone: Well, it feels like it's about 3 or 4 inches up in there! No… No. Well, did you see the pictures? Because you can totally see it's all the way up in there!
Oil Company
Tulsa, Oklahoma
Like That One Time at Andy Dick's House
Worker getting up from corner of a desk: Oh my god, I think I sat on a nerve… My penis is numb! You know the technique “the stranger” where you sit on your hand?
Coworker: Yeah.
Numb worker: This is the opposite of that, it's like I have someone else's penis in my pants right now.
168th Street
Omaha, Nebraska
If You People Don't Get Busy, I'm Out Of a Job
Lab worker packing specimens to send to reference lab: Wow! I don't have any gonorrhea or chlamydia today!
Kokomo, Indiana
The Body Of Christ, for Instance.
Boss: (reaches for candy from office candy jar)
Subordinate: Don't eat the chocolate bunny candies, those things are creepy.
Boss: I've put weirder things in my mouth.
Manhattan, New York
Why Mr. Benson Got Fired: Explained
Middle aged TA, muttering to computer: Oh, look! It's an anal party!
Middle School
Iowa
Overheard by: former NYer