Archive for the ‘Science and engineering’ Category

11AM Prod­uct Test

Su­per­vi­sor: What are you do­ing?
Col­lege kid #1: Spray­ing each oth­er.
Su­per­vi­sor: Do you know what is in those bot­tles?
Col­lege kid #2: No.
Su­per­vi­sor: Why would you spray each oth­er with some­thing you don’t know?
Col­lege kid #2: It’s fun.
Su­per­vi­sor: It’s ace­tone!
Col­lege kid #1: Is that like wa­ter or some­thing?
Su­per­vi­sor: God, I’m go­ing back to my of­fice.

465 Paul Road
Rochester, New York

Over­heard by: Nick I

Ap­par­ent­ly “Make Stuff­ing” Is an Ar­cane In­sult in North Car­oli­na

(sci­en­tist gets in a packed el­e­va­tor)
Sci­en­tist: I can’t be­lieve it’s this busy the day be­fore Thanks­giv­ing.
Sec­re­tary: Sur­pris­ing­ly.
Sci­en­tist: I said: “I can’t be­lieve it’s this busy!” It’s the day be­fore Thanks­giv­ing!
Tech: It’s ac­tu­al­ly two days from Thanks­giv­ing.
Sci­en­tist: I’m go­ing to go home and make my turkey tonight. Have it ready for the fam­i­ly!
Suit: What a good idea. You should make the stuff­ing with it, save time.
(sci­en­tist smiles, gets off)
Tech: That was­n’t nice.
Suit: He fart­ed while in an el­e­va­tor, I don’t care.

Ex­treme­ly Small El­e­va­tor
Re­search Tri­an­gle Park, North Car­oli­na

12PM Lunch

En­gi­neer: So, did you en­joy your Cin­co de Mayo?
Sec­re­tary: Um. I was in Rhode Is­land for the week­end…
En­gi­neer: Yeah, so?
Sec­re­tary: Ever been?
En­gi­neer: Yeah, cou­ple of times… what’s your point?
Sec­re­tary: Heh. Rhode Is­land is like the white-bread cap­i­tal, at least the part where I go is.
En­gi­neer: Okaayyy… so there was no Cin­co de Mayo cel­e­bra­tion?
Sec­re­tary: Dude, lemme put it this way for ya: It’s so damn white up there, they have white gar­den­ers. Mex­i­cans are like freakin’ nonex­is­tant up there. And don’t even get me start­ed on the nonex­is­tance of black peo­ple. Hell, the last time I saw a black per­son while I was up there was the one we brought with us…and she kept sin­gin’ “Mas­sa got me workin’ ” just to freak the rest of the whities out.

One Penn Plaza
New York, New York

Over­heard by: *snick­er*