Cubicle dweller: Yeah, I never lick envelopes anymore… Not since 9/11.
Providence, Rhode Island
Cubicle dweller: Yeah, I never lick envelopes anymore… Not since 9/11.
Providence, Rhode Island
Accounts Payable: I told you I shipped that invoice.
Accounts Receivable: It says on the label it was returned for address.
Accounts Payable: I wrote the right address. It says, “Little Rock, Kansasaw”!
Accounts Receivable: Oh, okay. Don’t know why it got returned, then.
2000 Plainfield Pike
Cranston, Rhode Island
Overheard by: Oh no, they were serious
General manager: Folks, this year is going to be like The Perfect Storm. You know, that movie with Kevin Costner.
Sales rep #1, whispering: Was Kevin Costner even in that movie?
General manager: We can either ride it out or we can push to the crest of the tsunami!
Sales rep #1: Didn’t people die in The Perfect Storm?
Sales rep #2: Yes.
Plainfield Pike, Rhode Island
Woman describing new car: It’s like the Cadillac of cars!
Providence, Rhode Island
Woman: Man, I got so shitfaced last night. Major hangover. I’m not gonna get anything done.
Lackey: Well, good thing you’re a VP. You can get away with that kind of thing.
Woman: I know, right? And I don’t even have a college education!
Lackey: Guess I wasted those four years and workday sobriety for nothing. And all this time I could have been a hungover dropout.
Woman: Live and learn!
Providence, Rhode Island
Overheard by: Kate
Rep #1: She wears disgusting eye makeup…like a tarantula.
Rep #2: Gross!
Rep #1: I know. She looks like a tramp. I mean, she can’t keep her legs closed.
Rep #2: Nasty!
Rep #1: She thinks she is so hot. Yeah, right.
Rep #2: Wait, isn’t she like, your best friend?
Rep #1: Of course!
Plainfield Pike, Rhode Island
Co-worker #1: Why are there empty containers in the fridge?
Co-worker #2: To keep them cold.
12 Bassett Street
Providence, Rhode Island
CSR: Don’t you slide out of leather easier than cloth?
Hammarlund Way
Middletown, Rhode Island
Overheard by: Weasal whisperer
Co-Worker #1: …and who ordered the salad?
Co-Worker #2: Marie*, but she left for the day.
Co-Worker #1: Is she okay?
Co-Worker #2: I hope so. She was crying when she left. I guess the police called and said her 7‑year-old daughter was a town over from where she was supposed to be, and no one knows where the sitter went.
Co-Worker #1: Oh, that’s awful. [long pause] So you think that means I can eat her salad?
Providence, Rhode Island
Overheard by: Kate
Guy #1: Shouldn’t you know?
Guy #2: Dude, I don’t know anything. I’m not a Sultan.
West Greenwich, Rhode Island
Overheard by: Stan
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist