Art director: If you're going to dress like a woman, act like a woman. Put the seat down.
Dallas, Texas
Overheard by: Lindsay
Archive for the ‘Restroom’ Category
It’s Been Oolong Time Since I Embarrassed Myself Like That
Agent: Oh, now I remember why I don’t usually drink pee. It always makes me have to go to the washroom… Tea. Tea! I meant tea!… Fuck you all.
1616 27th Avenue Northeast
Calgary, Alberta, Canada
Overheard by: Didn’t believe him
Frankly, What You Did in There Was Subpar
Male boss: I want you to know that was awesomely wicked!
Female worker, just exiting ladies’ room: You can hear what people do in there?
Male boss: No! No… I meant, that e-mail you sent last week.
Kitchener, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Notdaboss
The Boss May Have Delegated His Digestion to Me
(toilet, stall to the left)
Coworker: Corn? Corn? When did I have corn?
Harrisburg , Pennsylvania
Overheard by: in between stalls
I'd Use the Ladies' Room on Another Floor
Office girl leaving restroom: That's it! I'm done with all my girl parts!
Hawaii
I Don't Need You Falling Asleep on the Toilet Again
Male office peon: Do you have any magazines that are interesting and stimulating?
Female office peon (hiding Logistics Management magazine): You are not taking it to the bathroom.
Clifton, New Jersey
Overheard by: My magazines have sentimental value
Not Even a Mint on the Seat?
Manager leaving toilet stall, to next person in line: Don’t worry — I didn’t leave anything in there.
473 Ridge Road
Dayton, New Jersey
Overheard by: office peon
A Misguided Attempt to Assert Alpha Female Status
Female coworker #1: Are your poops big?
Female coworker #2: Well, I don’t exactly examine…
Female coworker #1: Well, compare your big poop to something in real life.
Female coworker #2: This is ridiculous.
Female coworker #1: No, I’m serious.
Female coworker #2: I don’t know, an egg?
Female coworker #1: How many eggs?
Female coworker #2: Three, four?
Female coworker #1: Well, my big poop is like the size of a Nalgene water bottle.
Gladstone Avenue & Galena Boulevard
Aurora, Illinois
Overheard by: Just Trying to Eat My Lunch
Don’t Ask Me to Explain That, Either
Guy, coming out of the men’s room: Wait. Someone actually stole the posters… from around the urinal?
Comic book guy: Don’t ask me to explain it.
Guy: Were they unfamiliar with the concept of nerd hygiene?
Broadway
New York City, New York
Her Poop?
Nurse #1: I love poop!
Nurse #2 to everyone: She's losing it!
Hospital
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Lauren