Archive for the ‘Receptionists’ Category

2PM Fol­low Up with HR

Sec­re­tary: I could swear that I read that if you have a death in the fam­i­ly you au­to­mat­i­cal­ly get two days off.
Nurse: Well, I looked it up in the pro­to­col. You can have days off, but they’re just reg­u­lar PTO.
Sec­re­tary: Right, I know they’re PTO, but I swear I read that they’re au­to­mat­ic if you have a death in the fam­i­ly.
Nurse: No, it’s like any oth­er PTO, you have to have them ap­proved by your su­per­vi­sor.
Sec­re­tary: I swear I read that you get those days off for a fam­i­ly death.
Nurse: Well, I’m sure every su­per­vi­sor would be hap­py to quick­ly ap­prove your PTO if some­one dies.
Sec­re­tary: Yeah, but I swear I read some­where that you get two days au­to­mat­i­cal­ly for that.
Nurse: Please, tell me one more time about how you read that some­where.

Med­ical Cen­ter Boule­vard
Win­ston-Salem, North Car­oli­na

10AM Vis­it Con­struc­tion Site

Re­cep­tion­ist: What’s that?
Work­er: It’s the Phoenix Project lo­go.
Re­cep­tion­ist: Why’s there a bird on it?
Man­ag­er #1: You have got to be kid­ding?
Re­cep­tion­ist: What?
Man­ag­er #2: Bird, Phoenix? Hel­lo?
Re­cep­tion­ist: I don’t get it.
Clerk: Okay, the bird…it’s a phoenix.
Re­cep­tion­ist: Phoenix is a city.
Clerk: …Phoenix is, al­so, a mytho­log­i­cal bird.
Re­cep­tion­ist: Named af­ter the city?

10 Miles South of Bat­tle Moun­tain
Bat­tle Moun­tain, Neva­da

4PM Call [the Client]

Sec­re­tary: [The client] keeps call­ing and ask­ing for me. And you know what? The next time he does that, I’m go­ing to tell him that you lied to him.
Boss: What? Why?
Sec­re­taty: Be­cause you tell him you’re go­ing to do all these things for him, and you don’t!
Boss: That’s be­cause he’s an id­iot!

527 West Jef­fer­son Street
Louisville, Ken­tucky

I’d Like to Buy a New Pol­i­cy, and Then Can­cel It

Cus­tomer: Why did my pol­i­cy can­cel?
Sec­re­tary: For non-pay­ment, sir.
Cus­tomer: But I nev­er got a bill.
Sec­re­tary: You mean, the one you hand­ed me when you walked in with a due date of Jan­u­ary 30th*?
Cus­tomer: Yes, that bill.
Sec­re­tary: It would­n’t have can­celed if you had paid this bill, sir.
Cus­tomer: Well, I’m not go­ing to re­new that pol­i­cy, then…
Sec­re­tary: There is noth­ing to re­new, sir — it can­celed for non-pay­ment!

977 Yad­kinville Road
Mocksville, North Car­oli­na

Over­heard by: Karen

They Could Call Me Pe­ter Dust-Pan

Re­cep­tion­ist: You know He-Man and how when he lifts his sword he gets a sud­den jolt of steroids?
Styl­ist: Yeah.
Re­cep­tion­ist: Well, would­n’t it be awe­some if I could lift the broom and be­come a broom god?!
Styl­ist: Um, no.

Bar­ber shop
No­blesville, In­di­ana