Receptionist: Every time I hear that phone, it’s ringing!
3424 Peachtree Road NE
Atlanta, Georgia
Receptionist: Every time I hear that phone, it’s ringing!
3424 Peachtree Road NE
Atlanta, Georgia
HR assistant: So, Paul*, when are you gonna take a look at my thing? I’m bursting at the seams, right?
Paul the safety director: [laughing] I can’t look now — and will never look at your thing.
HR assistant: But, dang it! I need some space! Look at how my file cabinets are overflowing!!
Paul: HR isn’t the only department that needs filing space!
HR assistant: [sighs] I just need someone to look and to care!
4730 South Fort Apache
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: Corporate Paralegal
Assistant #1: I want to stab my eyes out. Is that normal?
Assistant #2: Yes.
Assistant #1: Just wanted to make sure.
640 5th Avenue
New York, NY
Secretary #1: That was a funny email you sent earlier; I couldn’t
stop cracking up.
Secretary #2: Hey, I just try to make you all laugh.
Intern: For you to make them laugh all they have to do is look at
your face.
28 State Street
Boston, Massachusetts
Speakerphone: So, we’re filling out nametags for next week’s meeting. What’s Randy’s title?
Receptionist: Well, he’s The Boss.
Speakerphone: Okay, but what’s his title?
Receptionist: “The Boss”. He’s The Boss.
Speakerphone: All right, he’s your boss, but what’s his title?
Receptionist: He’s “The Boss”!
Speakerphone: Oh, well then…um, okay that’s great. Thanks for your help.
35555 Garfield Road
Clinton Township, Michigan
Overheard by: Stephanie Saffold
Teen girl, holding a bag with a dead bird inside: My grandfather called earlier about getting this bird checked for West Nile virus. He found it in his yard.
Office clerk: Ok, I remember talking to him this morning. I need to get some information from you first. Now, what was his name?
The girl’s eyes get big, and she looks at the bag.
Office clerk: No, not the bird’s name. I need to know your grandfather’s name.
616 Court Street
Oberlin, Louisiana
Overheard by: Vicky
Clerk #1: My nephew is getting married, and his mother is not happy.
Clerk #2: Why’s that?
Clerk #1: Well she is Mexican, Italian or maybe from India. I don’t know. They just don’t like her. He’s really intelligent, but they’re worried about him quitting college now.
1400 Douglas Street
Omaha, Nebraska
Overheard by: unbelievable
Paralegal: Well, Montreal is technically in America.
Design Center Place
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: umm … really?
Person: Hi, I’m here for my 1 o’clock meeting. I know I’m a little early…
Receptionist: I’m sorry, what?
Person: I’m here for my meeting at 1; I’m early. Sorry about that.
Receptionist: Um…Yeah, it’s almost 3…So…
Person: Oh sorry, right, 3, must be in a different time zone.
9250 Beverly Boulevard
Los Angeles, California
Secretary: My pencil drawer is broken. It needs a new twisty nail.
Boss: Twisty nail?
Secretary: Yeah, you know, with the X‑groove on top.
Boss: You mean a Phillips-head screw?
Secretary: Whatever.
118 East Whittier
St. Francis, Kansas
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist