Client: Is that a square or an oval?
Boss: Um… Square…?
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Archive for the ‘Questions’ Category
…Instead Of Deer Hunting?
Grad student: Let's get that second kit, there's more solution and tubes.
Advisor: Great, we'll get more buck for our dollar.
Grad student: Um, what?
Advisor: More buck for your dollar.
Grad student: Do you mean “more bang for our buck”?
Advisor: Well, I thought that's what it was, but that sounds dirty. Like prostitutes or something, so I said the other thing.
Grad student: Why does your mind always go straight to prostitutes?
Johns Hopkins University
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: LabCat
Things Haven’t Let What Up?
Co-Worker #1: Are you ok? You seem frazzled.
Co-Worker #2: Oh, I hit the ground running this morning, and things haven’t let up.
Co-Worker #1: You hit the ground? Did you hurt yourself?
1700 North Maitland Avenue
Maitland, Florida
Overheard by: Siege
Kinda Like How I'm Dyslexic After Four Vodka Tonics
Girl #1: I feel bad for that kid, Matt*.
Girl #2: Which one? That loud kid?
Girl #1: Well yeah, the loud kid, but he has Asperger's syndrome, so he kind of doesn't get it, you know?
Guy: I once had a roommate that thought he had Asperger's, and I was always like, “man, shut up. You just did too much coke again.”
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: LabCat
It Sounds Like a Delicious Cocktail
Girl #1: Do you like Carly Simon?
Girl #2: I don’t know what that is.
Canal and Broadway
New York City, New York
Send in Jack Bauer!
Dad: Honey, where’s your teddy bear?
3-year-old girl: Oh, the terrorist are hiding him.
Overlake Hospital
Bellevue, Washington
Overheard by: Nurse says what
Are We Still Talking About This Printer Jam?
Manager: Or are you in so deep that you have to finish it before you can move on?
Chattanooga, Tennessee
Overheard by: figuratively speaking, of course
The Mormon Conversion Process Is Extremely Rigorous
Partner #1: So how was it?
Partner #2: Ugh… long, hot, sticky.
Partner #1: Hm. What'd they make you do?
Salt Lake City, Utah
The Episode Of Full House You Never Saw
Boss: What's the hourly rate for Becky? (pause) I want to know her hourly rate. How much per hour?
Lexington, Kentucky
Overheard by: Brian
Word to Your Analog
Cubicle rat in break room: What time is it?
Bagger, looking at digital time clock: 6:30, straight up.
Albertsons Supermarket
California
Overheard by: Bill