Professor #1: What’s going on out there?
Professor #2: It’s either a gang fight or a game of Red Rover.
College
West Virginia
Overheard by: Professor 3
Archive for the ‘Questions’ Category
Yeah, Smells Like It
Coworker #1: So are you eating meat now? Can you eat tuna?
Coworker #2: Yeah, I’m eating meat. I would eat tuna.
Downers Grove, Illinois
Overheard by: SocialWorkIsKillingMe
Allow Me to Execute the Awkward Turtle Hand Gesture
Paper-white new dad: Would like you to see a picture of my son?
Coworker: Oh, he’s so cute! What ethnicity is your wife?
Paper-white new dad: She’s Spanish.
Coworker: Oh, I love brown babies.
Paper-white new dad: What, excuse me?
West 22nd Street
New York City, New York
Overheard by: Phil F.
Who the Hell Hired You, Anyway?
Operations manager: What are some of your goals?
New hire: I want to have babies!
Operations manager: Ok… Do you have any goals in regards to your future with our company?
New hire: Sure, I want to do my job right, but I was really just born to have babies.
Dallas Parkway
Dallas
Overheard by: Addy
Sarcasm Is the Working Class’s Weapon Of Choice Against the Bourgeois
Random stranger: Is that the ATM from upstairs?
Worker, hauling ATM down hallway: Yep.
Random stranger: So now I can’t get money upstairs?
Worker: Oh, no. The money’s still there in a pile. Just take what you need.
Bethesda, Maryland
I’m Databasing. Are You Databasing?
Worker #1 referring to a computer file titled as her name: Are you in me?
Worker #2: Yeah, I’m in you.
Norristown, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: a little small
Dante’s Inferno Was Actually Set in Yonkers
Older lady: The bag can’t go through the ass! I’m writing him an e‑mail. He’s taking this shit back.
Younger lady: Hey, are we allowed to drop the s‑bomb on packaging?
Yonkers, New York
Overheard by: Jay B
But Could We Not Have This Conversation at the Urinal?
Boss: You like that little tool, don’t you?
Worker: The keyboard? Yeah, it’s great.
Uniontown, Ohio
12PM Monitor Calls
CSR: Oh, you work on computers? You probably know more than I do so this should be an easy call, huh?
25 Brooklyn Avenue
Forsyth, Georgia
My Secret? I Keep Absinthe in My Side Drawer.
Girl coworker: I’ll e‑mail the help desk…I’ll just say “please help us, help desk.” Ahahah! I ‘m so funny.
Guy coworker: Okay, good idea. You’re typing all in caps.
Girl coworker: I know! That’s because everything is in capitals on my computer.
Guy coworker: Um, you have the cap locks on.
Girl coworker: What is that?
Guy coworker: The caps lock key on your keyboard?
Girl coworker: Oh, no! My computer is just all caps.
Guy coworker: No, just do this. (does it) See? Now you’re not in caps anymore.
Girl coworker: Oh my gosh! You are so smart! Oh! Thank you so much! Oooohhh! Let me retype my e‑mail to the help desk! “Please help us, help desk.” That’s so funny! “Please help us, help desk.”
Northern California
