I Shouldn't Need a Fork to Consume It.

Boss: Who made the coffee this morning?
Underling, defensively: Why?

Navy Yard
Washington, DC

No, the Roman Numeral

CSR verifying an address: “J” as in the letter “J” in the alphabet?

Manhattan, New York

2PM Pick Up Mail

Co-worker #1: Is [Hal] here?
Co-worker #2: No.
Co-worker #1: What should I do with the mail? Do you get it?
Co-worker #2: What do you do with the mail every day?
Co-worker #1: Put it on [Hal]’s desk.
Co-worker #2: Well then?
Co-worker #1: Well I wasn’t sure. I forgot.

740 Sansom Street
Phiadelphia, Pennsylvania

2PM Print Termination Letter

Boss: You know what my problem is? I’m too nice a guy. I fired [Lenore] this morning. I should’ve kept her on till the end of the day, but then I would’ve felt like I was using her. I’m an idiot.
Salesperson: That’s two problems.

40 Shuman Boulevard
Naperville, Illinois

10AM Conference Call

Coworker #1: Is Florida’s time zone one or two hours behind us?
Coworker #2: I’m not sure. It’s pretty far south, so probably two.

235 Promenade Street
Providence, Rhode Island

Blue…No, Red. Red!!

Employer: If I were to ask you for one thing you are not good at, what would it be?
Interviewee: Uh…answering questions like this one?

Insurance HR office
Toronto, Canadia

Probably.

Clerk: Blumenthal… Yeah, Blumenthal. You think he's any relation to that mayor of New York?

Omaha, Nebraska

Overheard by: Doug's Mom

I Prefer to Call Myself a “Money Magician”

Accountant: So it's an EFT, whatever that stands for.
CSR: “Electronic funds transfer.” Wait… Aren't you an accountant!?

Newmarket
Ontario
Canadia

So You Might Want to Hold Your Nose

Accountant to another: Have I mentioned that I need to depreciate?

Anselmo Lane
Baton Rouge, Louisiana

Overheard by: Carlen

Therefore Doubly Exempt from Knowledge of Your Crappy Music

Older cube dweller: That was the title of a great Rascals song. Have you heard of The Rascals?
Younger cube dweller: No, I'm young. And foreign.

Troy, New York