Male coworker: There’s nothing worse than feeling not-so-fresh when you have a doctor between your legs.
Female coworker just walking into the conversation: Huh?
200 Constitution Avenue
Washington, DC
Archive for the ‘Possible Sexual Harassment’ Category
I Regret Nothing
Worker bee #1: Is that a PlayStation Three?
Worker bee #2: Yeah.
Worker bee #1: Those are hard to come by. I bet you had to beat off a lot of guys in the store to get that one.
Worker bee #2: [Silence.]
150 Granby Street
Norfolk, Virginia
At Least, That’s What It Looks Like through the Keyhole
Older gentleman in response to memo on sexual harassment: In this office we don’t have sexual harassment, we just have sex!
Seguin, Texas
No, It’s Only If You Do It with the Students
Teacher: It’s not like you go out in nature and see plants, like, getting it on. [Class laughs.] I don’t know if I’m allowed to say that at school…
Covington, Louisiana
Overheard by: Erica
The Thin Line between Clean and Dirty
Italian musician in broken English: Excuse… Can you… wash… my instrument?
Agent: What?
Italian roadie: He wants to know if you have a cloth to clean his instrument.
Agent: Oh. Oh. Okay. God, I almost just smacked him!
Italian musician: Wash my instrument now?
Vienna
Austria
12PM Schedule Follow-ups
Director: I have you down for 8AM.
Analyst: I can’t at that time. I have to drop off my son at day care.
Director: That’s okay, I’ll do you later.
4302 Town Center Boulevard
El Dorado Hills, California
It’s an Executive Privilege
Boss: I think it’s time for a sodey!
Coworker: What, like, mix it yourself?
Boss: Yup! I’m going to jerk it right here at my desk!
Rockefeller Plaza
New York, New York
Overheard by: talking-to-hr-about-moving-my-desk
10AM Running Late
Co-worker #1: What was that white box you were carrying?
Co-worker #2: Donuts. Why, you want one?
Co-worker #1: Yes!
Co-worker #3: Where were you?
Co-worker #1: What? Do you want donuts, too?
Co-worker #3: No, I want you to explain yourself for being late.
Co-worker #4: Yeah, you didn’t say anything when you called me at 7 this morning.
Co-worker #5: Yeah, she didn’t say anything to me last night at 11, either.
All stare at co-worker #5.
Co-worker #2: Just take the donuts and go away.
Co-worker #5: That’s what you said last night at 11, too!
401 Church Street
Nashville, Tennessee
… I’ll Bring Booze and the Necessary Plug-Ins
Female designer: If you show up, you can watch me use your hard drive.
IT guy: Ummm…
44 Canal Center Plaza
Alexandria, Virginia
9AM Back to Work
Co-worker #1: Oh, I’m so glad you are here.
Co-worker #2: Why?
Co-worker #1: Because I got my hand stuck in the hole.
6 Campus Drive
Parsippany, New Jersey