Customer Service Specialist on phone: No, sir. You just had a credit line increase yesterday…Well, sir. That’s how the potato chips.
Customer Service Specialist: …Damn towelhead.
14700 Citicorp Drive
Hagerstown, Maryland
Archive for the ‘On the phone’ Category
Ten-Million-Dollar Discrimination Suits Start Out Innocently Enough
Manager: We really need to work on proper pronunciation on the phones. We really hear a lot of this, and it definitely needs to be improved. For instance: How do you say a‑s-k? Anyone? (pause) You say “ask” not “axed”!
Employee: Well, who say dat?
Wayne, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: office grunt #12
The Cracks Spread With Alarming Rapidity
CSR: Nancy had, like, a nervous breakdown after a phone call that lasted an hour and a half. I felt bad for her, but it was also kinda cool. It was like watching glass shatter.
Newton, Massachusetts
Just Try Not to Make Convulsive Gulping Noises
Boss: I don’t want to drink by myself.
Employee: You won’t be. You’ll be on a conference call.
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: Mark W.
When Auditors Give Pep Talks to Each Other
Coworker on phone: Well, tell her to bend over and hand you some KY.
Cartersville, Georgia
Overheard by: Shocked and Disturbed
Is It “Defamation” If It’s True? Discuss.
Clued-out senior manager on phone with lawyer: I just want a translation of the document. It’s written all in French. I’m from Ontario, we don’t speak the language here. (pause) Well, I just want the gist of the document. I think he’s suing us for defamation of character. (pause) The guy’s a jerk.
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: Cue
Just Kidding! It’s Actually “Wolfeschlegelsteinhausenbergerdorff”
CSR on phone: Let me spell that for you, that name is McKeon: “m” as in “m”, “c” as in “c”, “k” as in “k”, “e” as in “e”, “o” as in “o”, “n” as in “n”.
Portland, Maine
Overheard by: brian brinegar
Ad: From the Henhouse to the Crackhouse to Your House!
Sales director on phone: Geeze, people are after our chicken like crack. Our chicken is crack!
Ronks, Pennsylvania
Good Thing We Only Have a Couple of Those a Year
Woman on phone: That’s why I’m not going to drive the Kia on hot days anymore.
Lind Avenue
Renton, Washington
Speaking of Porn Addicts
Consultant on phone with spouse: Oh, I’m just reading a blog post about a woman flying from San Francisco to Newark, and this guy sitting next to her starting to watch hardcore porn on his laptop… Well I’d hope he was wearing headphones! Did your father feed the baby yogurt again?
5th and Market
San Francisco, California
