Sales rep #1: I wish we had cordless phones.
Sales rep #2: Why?
Sales rep #1: Well, if I'm going to be on hold, I might as well be pooping or something.
Fort Mill, South Carolina
Archive for the ‘On the phone’ Category
Why Dan Had to Change His Name to Dai
CSR on phone: His name is Dan. That's “d” as in “dog,” “a” as in “apple,” “n” as in “India.”
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: bored receptionist
When Louis Farrakhan Dreams
Account executive on phone: I don't think we can release the Caucasian…
46th & Lexington
New York City, New York
The Masai Start Buying Up Manhattan Businesses
Employee on phone: What did you say? I'm not going to drink the blood of a cow!
New York City, New York
You're in Luck– They're the Same Guy!
Coworker on phone: Hi, may I speak to your moaner? I mean, “owner”?
Mustang, Oklahoma
Dude, You Need to Improve Your Supply Chain Management
Coworker on phone: I don't want to know, dude. It's like if the condom broke with a skank… I really don't want to think about the pregnancy, or if she has the herpes, until she gets a tummy or I get a cold sore.
Boca Raton, Florida
But That’s “Mom” to You, Buddy
Manager, just after he finishes dialing phone: I’m calling ol’ big tits.
Female voice: Uh, hello?
Manager: Oh… Hi. Who is this?
Female voice, angrily: This is ‘big tits,’ apparently.
Circle Centre Mall
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: Shatmandu
Though Sometimes I Do Hollow Them Out and Store My Weed in Them– Any Questions?
Not-so-smart office girl on phone: They think I read The Enquirer or something. I don't. I read people, I don't read books.
The Woodlands, Texas
Overheard by: hallokitty
1PM Conference Call
Call leader: Whoever has your phone on hold, please take us off hold. We can hear the music.
151 Major Reynolds Place
Knoxville, Tennessee
Overheard by: mba
…And We Know Times Are Tight…
Coworker on phone: Well, we do have backdoor service, but it's more expensive than our other services.
West Rutland, Vermont