Cube rat #1: Hey, is that light bothering you? It’s driving me crazy.
Cube rat #2: No, it’s not.
Cube rat #1: Really? I can’t stand it.
Cube rat #2: Yeah, I know, that’s why I like it.
Cincinnati, Ohio
Archive for the ‘Ohio’ Category
For Bernard, the Processes of Digestion and Elimination Had Become Suboptimal
Greasy suit as his chili is served: … And that’s exactly why I go in to get colonics.
Skyline Chili
Cincinnati, Ohio
Because Their Secretary Told Me They’re Missing Page 47 over There
Boss: I’ve got part of the Kama Sutra on my wall.
Employee: Do we need to talk to H.R.?
175 South 3rd Street
Columbus, Ohio
Aren’t Dong Bongs Illegal in Ohio?
Coworker: It’s so cheesy – the dong. It’s like “here, hit the dong! We’re not giving you a raise, but you get to hit the dong.”
Dublin, Ohio
Overheard by: MissTW
You Always Take a Weird Exit off the Conversation Highway
Bible-thumping coworker: It’s my son’s 35th birthday today. I can’t believe my oldest is going to be 35.
Normal coworker: Oh? How many children do you have?
Bible-thumping coworker: Let’s see… I have three biological and one spiritual. But we’re much more than spiritual, really. It’s like we have this connection.
Normal coworker, to herself: Riiiiight.
100 Main Street
Cincinnati, Ohio
2PM Debriefing
Creative director: Alright, nice work, guys.
Designer: Before you leave, can I grab you real quick–
Creative director: Depends on where.
312 Plum Street
Cincinnati, Ohio
Well, At That Point a Small Night Demon Gets Onto a Treadmill Under the Hood…
Dude: If you really want to save money on gas then you should get a hybrid car.
Chick: Hybrid? Does that mean it runs on electricity?
Dude: Uh…yeah
Chick: Well what happens when the sun goes down?
317 West Main Cross Street
Findlay, Ohio
Overheard by: Crut
Why Depends Were Originally Invented
50-year old guy #1: I don’t want to be here.
50-year old guy #2, passing by: Just shit your pants. Nobody likes working with you if you have shitty pants.
Rocky River, Ohio
“The Crow Flies at Midnight”
Boss: Let’s be clear about this… Actually, no, let’s be unclear.
10900 Martin Luther King Drive
Cleveland, Ohio
It’s Possible You Won’t Believe What You See
Shipping clerk: I have a package here for you.
Asian scientist: What is in the box?
Shipping clerk: I don’t know, but it’s probably cells, since it says ‘dry ice.‘
Asian scientist: But what’s in the box?
Shipping clerk: Why don’t we take it to the lab and open the box?
Asian scientist: Okay, but what’s in the box?
American scientist: I think that’s the stuff you ordered.
Asian scientist: Oh, yes, okay. But what can possibly be in the box?
Columbus, Ohio
