Archive for the ‘Ohio’ Category

1PM Lunch

Co-work­er #1: Hey, tell them that sto­ry you were telling me the oth­er day. The one about Burg­er King.
Co-work­er #2: What sto­ry about Burg­er King?
Co-work­er #1: You know…you were with your dad or your fa­ther-in-law…
Co-work­er #2: The sto­ry where my fa­ther had a heart at­tack be­cause of a Burg­er King sand­wich?
Co-work­er #1: …Yeah.
Co-work­er #2: That’s the sto­ry.

312 Plum Street
Cincin­nati, Ohio

That’s What You Said About Us­ing Your In­tern As a Bench

Suit #1: Hey, did the DB team ever send you that da­ta for your re­port?
Suit #2: No.
Suit #1: Can’t you just make up the num­bers?
Suit #2: I would, but I al­ready made up 60% of the num­bers in the re­port.
Suit #1: 60%?
Suit #2: Yeah, gen­er­al­ly 40% of the num­bers in a re­port have to be ac­cu­rate. It’s an ac­cept­ed stan­dard.

Cleve­land, Ohio

1PM Lunch

Work­er #1: Did you know that Big Lots closed all of its fur­ni­ture stores down? It was no IKEA but it sure had a few nice things in there. Damn I am full of gas this af­ter­noon.
Work­er #2: I did­n’t know they had fur­ni­ture stores…
Work­er #1: Yeah…They have sure­ly came a long way since I was a kid. They al­ways had like the crap­pi­est food stuff. They are a close-out store, right?
Work­er #2: I did­n’t know they had food.
Work­er #1: Well, not food food, but like ce­re­al.
Work­er #2: Oh, shelf food. Yeah.
Work­er #1: Yeah..I would to­tal­ly not buy dis­con­tin­ued ba­nanas. That’s just rank.

1 Eas­t­on Oval
Colum­bus, Ohio

…Could You Turn on My Com­put­er for Me?

Cre­ative di­rec­tor: I can’t take the course be­cause I don’t have the soft­ware.
Pe­on: Why don’t you find out what the soft­ware costs and how to get it, and sub­mit a pro­pos­al?
Cre­ative di­rec­tor: I don’t know where to find that in­for­ma­tion.
Pe­on: Why don’t you use some­thing called “the in­ter­net” to look it up?
Cre­ative di­rec­tor: You mean like go in­to Google and type the name of the soft­ware?
Pe­on: Yeah, like that.
Cre­ative di­rec­tor: Oh, good idea.

Colum­bus, Ohio

Over­heard by: Horse Whis­per­er