Archive for the ‘Office Politics’ Category

We For­got We Have to Watch Our Tongues Around You

Of­fice la­dy #1: I guess no one ob­ject­ed to me toss­ing out their sal­ad.
Of­fice la­dy #2: Well, Jim did when I tossed his.
Of­fice guy #1: I re­al­ly hope you guys are talk­ing about a reg­u­lar sal­ad.
Of­fice la­dy #2: No, I was talk­ing about his ass.
Of­fice la­dy #1: What? I don’t get it.

Uni­ver­si­ty of Mary­land

Over­heard by: Mykl

Tak­ing the ‘Vice’ Out of ‘Sleep­ing With the Vice-Pres­i­dent,’ One Ra­tio­nal­iza­tion at a Time

Woman #1: He had such a big pe­nis.
Woman #2: Oh my God, that is so hot. Did you hear about Richard*?
Woman #1: But he is a sub­or­di­nate! I am not cheat­ing on my hus­band with a sub­or­di­nate. It feels more guilty that way. At least I feel like I’m gain­ing more than plea­sure from sleep­ing with the ex­ec.

Main Street
Cam­bridge, Mass­a­chu­setts

Sor­ry, the Clown Suit Keeps Throw­ing Me Off

Lead an­i­ma­tor: Quit goof­ing off!
An­i­ma­tor: I’m not.
Lead an­i­ma­tor: I said no goof­ing off! Get to work!
An­i­ma­tor: I am work­ing.
Lead an­i­ma­tor, hit­ting an­i­ma­tor with poster: No talk­ing! Get to work!
An­i­ma­tor: I am work­ing!
Lead an­i­ma­tor: [Picks up com­put­er mouse, and throws it across the desk.] Get to work! No talk­ing!

Las Cruces, New Mex­i­co

Over­heard by: pret­ty pic­ture guy

12PM Meet­ing (Con­t’d)

VP: I don’t nec­es­sar­i­ly want you to im­prove one thing by 100%, but if you im­prove 100 things by 1% you will still have made 100% im­prove­ment. That’s all I ask.

5720 Peachtree Park­way
Nor­cross, Geor­gia