Ditzy coworker, giggling: My hair smells like Asian noodles!
Des Moines, Iowa
Archive for the ‘Meals and Snacks’ Category
…Why’s Everyone Giggling at Us?
Oblivious programmer #1, discussing lunch: It’s good… It’s very, very soft.
Oblivious programmer #2: It’s all about everything. It’s about the sauce.
Oblivious programmer #1: It’s my first time. It could be the last time.
Westwood, Massachusetts
Overheard by: I love work
Is He the Same One Whose Stomach Exploded from Pop Rocks and Soda?
Chubby secretary: So, my friend from college was roommates with this guy who went to high school with this girl whose brother was eaten by Jeffrey Dahmer!
Friend: Oh my god! You could have been killed!
Tampa, Florida
And Put It in Soup Form.
Woman ordering: Guess what I want today!
Sandwich guy: The usual?
Woman ordering, completely seriously: Yeah, except I’m going to change a few things up. Like…the bread and the stuff on it, ya know?
Cafeteria
Horsham, Pennsylvania
1PM Lunch
Employee #1: Look at all that food you have there.
Employee #2: It’s going to give me a heart attack, but I love it; especially all the greasy bacon and sausage.
Employee #3: I wish I knew someone who knows CPR in case you have a coronary.
Employee #2: [Sean] and [Gina] are medics, they should know CPR.
Employee #1: What do they know about CPR? They are ambulance drivers.
2727 Walker Avenue NW
Grand Rapids, Michigan
1PM Lunch
Co-worker #1: All we ever talk about in this office is food. It is
always in the conversation.
Co-worker #2: Well, it is at every social occasion, and we center our lives around it in a way.
Co-worker #1: We should all become prostitutes so our conversations
center around our sexual liaisons rather then food.
2601 4th Avenue
Seattle, Washington
Yeah, Smells Like It
Coworker #1: So are you eating meat now? Can you eat tuna?
Coworker #2: Yeah, I’m eating meat. I would eat tuna.
Downers Grove, Illinois
Overheard by: SocialWorkIsKillingMe
Make Her Come up with a Better Slogan Than ‘Can You Hear Me Now?’
Young ad executive #1: Anybody want a Jamba Juice? Sam the intern is going to make a run.
Young ad executive #2: Yeah, but why are you getting a Jamba Juice? You just ate lunch.
Young ad executive #1: I don’t really want one, I just feel bad the intern has nothing to do.
7th Avenue and 23rd Street
New York, New York
Overheard by: Corn Mash Whiskey
Translation: “I Don’t Want to Quit, But I Don’t Want to Work Here.”
Loud partner to secretary, giving his lunch order: I don’t want it spicy, but I don’t want it un-spicy.
Secretary, pretending she knows exactly what he means: Oh, sure, okay.
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: first year associate
…In Totally Unrelated News, I Met the CEO Today.
Coworker to another, during lunch: Would you know a maggot if you saw one?
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: Glad they didn’t bring anything back for me.
