Archive for the ‘Maryland’ Category

I’m Hoping to Put Everything Right With a Deathbed Confession

Professor: What’s the big deal? I don’t understand what I did wrong here.
Angry grad student: You put information in that grant that is absolutely wrong! You totally misconstrued the results!
Professor: Well…fine, but I said it was “early preliminary data,” so it should be okay.

Johns Hopkins University
Baltimore, Maryland

Overheard by: LabCat

Where Do You Think I’m Calling You From?

Boss on speaker phone: So I need you to give me those files, like, in five minutes.
Employee: Um.
Boss: I’m serious. I want them in my hand in five minutes.
Employee: You know that I work at home, right?
Boss: So?
Employee: So I live forty-five minutes away from your so-called “office”…Speaking of which, did you ever get that toilet out of the hallway?

3207 Hayloft Court
Frederick, Maryland

Overheard by: Ren

Yet You Can Speak Hebrew

Guy #1, in Hebrew: So, what retarded kid are you working with today?
Guy #2, in Hebrew: Dude. Those kids are around here, you know.
Guy #1: Yeah, but no one here knows Hebrew.
Guy #2: This school’s like half Jewish. They might.
Guy #1: Not the retarded ones. They have enough trouble with English. You should know that — you work here, too.

University of Maryland
College Park, Maryland

Overheard by: Knows Hebrew