Archive for the ‘Internet’ Category

My Secret? I Keep Absinthe in My Side Drawer.

Girl coworker: I’ll e‑mail the help desk…I’ll just say “please help us, help desk.” Ahahah! I ‘m so funny.
Guy coworker: Okay, good idea. You’re typing all in caps.
Girl coworker: I know! That’s because everything is in capitals on my computer.
Guy coworker: Um, you have the cap locks on.
Girl coworker: What is that?
Guy coworker: The caps lock key on your keyboard?
Girl coworker: Oh, no! My computer is just all caps.
Guy coworker: No, just do this. (does it) See? Now you’re not in caps anymore.
Girl coworker: Oh my gosh! You are so smart! Oh! Thank you so much! Oooohhh! Let me retype my e‑mail to the help desk! “Please help us, help desk.” That’s so funny! “Please help us, help desk.”

Northern California

Career Tip: Slow Readers Resent Duplicate Emails

Coworker to office administrator: Why did you send me this e‑mail twice?
Office admin: Because they sent it to me twice.
Coworker: So why did you send it to me twice?
Office admin: Because I thought it would only take you five seconds to delete.
Coworker: Didn’t you look at it before you sent it to me?
Office admin: Yes… but I didn’t send you the pornographic e‑mail that came in before that one!

Ottawa
Ontario
Canadia

In Case You Were Wondering What to Get Me for Bosses’ Day

Male staffer: There may be a problem.
Female manager: With what?
Male staffer: I was just typing an e‑mail about a birth certificate. Twice I typed “bitch” instead of “birth”.
Female manager: Oooh!
Male staffer: I corrected it before I sent it, though.
Female manager: Thank goodness. (pause) Gotta say, though, that I would love to have a bitch certificate. I mean, I do just fine without one, but it would be nice to have the formal recognition.

Harrisburg, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Michael