Boss: She’s just too crazy for me. She’s…what’s the word? Phonetic!
Associate: She sounds things out?
480 San Antonio
Mountain View, California
Archive for the ‘Gripes’ Category
More Salty, What with All That Sweat
Man: Yeah, they bring us all the way over to this new building and the air conditioner doesn’t even work. It’s June and ninety degrees, and no air conditioner…but it’s not like I’m bitter or anything.
735 Brewerton Road
West Point, New York
Don't Count on It, Mate
Male staff member: Yeah, but knowing my luck, it'll happen again when I'm not here!
Female staff member: It's okay. You're married now. You'll get lucky one day!
Blockbuster
Australia
We Figured You Upgraded from Food Crumbs
Male coworker covered in cardboard: Thanks for telling me I’ve been walking around with box all over my chest.
Stamford, Connecticut
Overheard by: K-Slim
Love the Orange Lipstick, Though
Blonde manager: These hooker shoes are killing my feet.
Wilshire Boulevard
Los Angeles, California
Time to Stop Having Dinner at Mel Gibson’s House
Jewish manager: I got your e-mail about XYZ Spring Company* not being able to make that spring.
Office girl: Yeah, those dirty– Ugh!
Jewish manager: It’s okay, it’s okay!
Office girl: They just keep quoting stuff, and when I give them an order they decide they can’t do it because they are little pieces–! Ugh! Never mind!
Jewish manager: Are you okay?
Office girl: Yeah… I’m just trying to be Christian today.
Jewish manager: … Good for you. [Walks away.]Office girl, from a distance: I need to say more things in my head. I think I’m fired now.
8220 England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
5PM I’m Calling It a Night
Co-worker: Dude, there is something really funky smelling coming from underneath my mousepad.
5215 North O’Connor Boulevard
Irving, Texas
Overheard by: imaninarticluatetool
How You Know Your Coworker Is Straight
Employee: Did you see the Accounting Department? They are all dressed up like the Village People… or the Seven Dwarfs — I’m not sure.
100 Mountain Road
Framingham, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Snow Whitefish
11AM Sign Contracts
Boss: But it shouldn’t be done this way!
Boss’s boss: I know. We’re getting fucked. But let’s just enjoy it.
420 5th Avenue
New York, NY
9AM It’s Too Early for This
Woman: There’s something wrong with my computer. There are satellites
and things floating around! Why did you work on my computer? I thought you were done. I have to get my work done! Do you know what you are doing! Fix it!
IT gal: Okay, let me see. I did not work on your system today, let me
look.
Mouse click.
IT gal: …It’s the screensaver.
4411 Beacon Circle
West Palm Beach, Florida