Archive for the ‘Gripes’ Category

12PM Lunch

Ac­coun­tant: This chick­en [Sue] brought in is yum­my. I’m just go­ing to take a break to eat it here rather than take it back to my desk. I don’t trust my­self not to get my pa­per­work all greasy.
Su­per­vi­sor: That’s why I’m go­ing to make a sand­wich out of it.
Sec­re­tary: Oh, I don’t care about greasy fin­gers. All I do is han­dle in­com­ing checks all day.

401 Church Street
Nashville, Ten­nessee

3PM Smoke Break

Su­per­vi­sor: You’re ei­ther talk­ing to your­self, singing to your­self, think­ing about talk­ing to your­self, or think­ing about singing to your­self. Am I right?

4708 Lacey Boule­vard SE
Lacey, Wash­ing­ton

Over­heard by: Chris Shard

11AM Project Meet­ing

Work­er #1: Check it out, [Brad]‘s ac­tu­al­ly be­ing use­ful!
Work­er #2: I don’t be­lieve it. And I’m not even go­ing to look be­cause I refuse to look at things that I know are lies.

740 Dun­das Street East
Toron­to, On­tario
Cana­dia

Oh Noz!

Cashier #1: What do you think of, you know, when peo­ple stick ran­dom Zs in­to words? Like, ‘For shiz­zle, my niz­zle’?
Cashier #2: Man, I hate it when peo­ple do that. They sound like they ain’t got no speech.

8700 East 63rd Street
Kansas City, Mis­souri

Over­heard by: Je­du­sor

10AM Re­ply to Email

Co-work­er #1: Does she al­ways send emails in 72 point font?
Co-work­er #2: Oh, that’s “mad” typ­ing.
Co-work­er #1: How should I re­spond to this?
Co-work­er #3: You should re­ply us­ing 86 point font.
Co-work­er #2: They don’t make 86 point font. I’ve tried it be­fore. You should use 8 point font in Bern­hard Fash­ion BT or some oth­er font that’s hard to read.
Co-work­er #1: Yeah, I’ll do that. She won’t be able to read it.
Co-work­er #2: That’ll re­al­ly piss her off.

620 Grei­son Trail
New­nan, Geor­gia