Secretary: What are they here for?
Boss: They are here to remove my organ.
Secretary: … What?
Fort Street
Lincoln Park, Michigan
Archive for the ‘Gossip’ Category
Do You Really Think Colonel Mustard Would Do That?
Assistant editor: She said she’s going to come over and hit you in the head with a pretzel.
1633 Broadway
New York, New York
4PM Smoke Break
Male coworker: There’s nothing worse than feeling not-so-fresh when you have a doctor between your legs.
Female coworker just walking into the conversation: Huh?
200 Constitution Avenue
Washington, DC
As I Am
Broker to real estate agent in training: When you’re doing an open house you have to talk to everybody, no matter how poor they look. You know, no matter how black they are… if you’re racist.
Huntington, New York
Did I Mention the Horses in Gynecological Stirrups?
Medical scientist #1: You know, they’ve got sheep in the basement…
Medical scientist #2: Our basement?!
Medical scientist #1: Yeah. It’s for heart surgery experiments. They bring them up for MRIs at night.
Medical scientist #2: There are sheep using our MRI machines?!
Medical scientist #1: Well, they’re only small ones…
Hospital, Flemington Road
Parkville, Victoria
Australia
Who’s Best Hands Up?
Woman #1: Heard from your old high school boyfriend lately?
Woman #2: No. He’s traveling. Moving to Florida. Wife number three.
Woman #1: Would you nail him again?
Woman #2: In a heartbeat. Best in oral sex, hands down.
Paramus, New Jersey
Overheard by: Makin’ Copies
Also Cleans Up Easier Than Motor Oil
Hairdresser: Oh, by the way, thanks for the tip about the Astroglide — it’s awesome! Client: Oh, you finally got some? And you love it?!
Hairdresser: Love it? I had to tell Paul* I saw an ad in Cosmo, or he’d know I was talking about our sex life at work.
Client: So, it’s cool, right? And doesn’t dry up, right?
Hairdresser: Listen, it makes him forget he’s a New York police officer — totally awesome!
Hillsdale, New Jersey
Overheard by: Receptionist
Why the Frolicking Class is Always Booked
Gym employee: I have so much energy! I just want to frolic around naked!
1400 East 6th Street
Tucson, Arizona
Overheard by: dana
Our Secret Formula — It’s Working!
Coworker: There are people making out on the lawn! [Everyone rushes to window to look.]
8900 Kelso Drive
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Thanking God I’m not white trash
Actually, They All Lived Together…
Employee: The first time it was with my friend– no, wait, my ex-friend. Then the second time it was with my boyfriend. Then I went over to my other boyfriend’s house…
Fast food joint
Durham, North Carolina