Worker bee: Oh, this is an ear. I thought it was something else.
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: usual suspect
Archive for the ‘General Idiocy’ Category
If the Terrorists Haven’t Won, the Idiocy Has
Temp: So maybe this’ll finally get the English fighting with us.
222 S. Riverside Plaza
Chicago, Illinois
Of Course Because I Didn’t Solicit It, He May Never Provide It
Manager: Sounds good. I asked Roger* for his unsolicited feedback on this, so that will be helpful.
42 South Street
Hopkinton, Massachusetts
11AM Return Calls to Clients
Co-worker on phone: Uh yes, this is [Brett Myers} with the Mortgage Company. It’s Wednesday, 10:30 AM…I’m sorry! It’s just that…well, you sounded like a voicemail voice.
1350 Deming Way
Middleton, Wisconsin
10AM Cultural Sensitivity Workshop
Co-worker #1: Hey, look at this expense report. It says he took $50
cab rides everyday and he has no receipts! He’s milking us.
Co-worker #2: Wow! But don’t say that to our boss. She’s Jewish too.
4301 N. Fairfax Drive
Arlington, Virginia
A Giant Gathering of Ruby Tuesdays Employees?
Boss: Okay, before we cross that Rubicon … Wait, does everyone know what the Rubicon was?
Minion: Yeah! It's the brain!
Boss: (blinks) Okay… Anyone else have a guess?
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: veni vidi deridei
Long John Silver Gets Easily Flustered During One-on-One Interviews
Interviewer: Do you have a middle initial?
Applicant: Nope. I got a whole middle name. John.
Attleboro, Massachusetts
4PM Performance Reviews
Manager: She’s actually very bright, she just doesn’t speak or write.
200 West Oak
Fort Collins, Colorado
… Where I Went to School
Man hanging up phone: Wow, that guy had a neat accent. He said he was from the United Kingdom.
Woman: United Kingdom? That’s in Florida, right?
Man: No, I think that’s the Magic Kingdom…
Woman: Oh, you’re right! United Kingdom is in Kentucky.
Spartanburg, South Carolina
Overheard by: Service Dispatcher
5PM That’s a Wrap
Boss: Oh you fucking idiot!
Pause
Boss: Why don’t you just go home, you wanker!
Boss walks out of the office.
Employee: Who are you yelling at?
Boss: Me, I’m going home!
301 Pirie Street
Adelaide, Australia
Overheard by: Jessica