Boss, walking over to two female employees reading The Financial Times: Is that paper pink? What paper is that?
Underling: It’s special. Just for girls.
Boss, cautiously: Oh, okay. Carry on.
San Francisco, California
Archive for the ‘General Idiocy’ Category
Oops.
Congressional staffer in hallway, in low voice: I gotta be careful who’s around… It might be dangerous to be overheard.
House of Representatives Office Building
Washington, DC
3PM Cigarette Break
Admin: Hey, Simon Wiesenthal died! Who’s he?
Suit: Oh, he hunted Nazis or something. Cool!
Admin: Cool that he died?
Suit: Cool that he’s in my dead pool!
1600 Broadway
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: C. O’ntracter
5PM That’s a Wrap
Associate #1: Well, you look nice today.
Associate #2: Stop being mean to me!
11755 Wilshire Boulevard
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: AJ Feuerman
I Know It’s True for Me, at Least
Head trainer: Let’s face it, if you could be all that you could be, you wouldn’t be working here…
Class: [Silence.]Trainee #1: [Applause.]Trainees #2 and #3: [Applause.]
Mutual of America, 320 Park Avenue
New York, New York
Yet You Can Speak Hebrew
Guy #1, in Hebrew: So, what retarded kid are you working with today?
Guy #2, in Hebrew: Dude. Those kids are around here, you know.
Guy #1: Yeah, but no one here knows Hebrew.
Guy #2: This school’s like half Jewish. They might.
Guy #1: Not the retarded ones. They have enough trouble with English. You should know that — you work here, too.
University of Maryland
College Park, Maryland
Overheard by: Knows Hebrew
I Just Sell the Books, Ma’am
Female coworker on phone: Is that ‘k’ as in ‘cat’?
Independence, Missouri
You Guys from Nantucket Are So Sensitive
Cube rat #1: Dude, I’m going to send you a poem.
Cube rat #2: Okay.
Cube rat #1: Don’t get offended, okay?
Cube rat #2: Okay.
Cube rat #1: Dude, promise me you won’t get offended.
4949 Westown Parkway
Des Moines, Iowa
The Worst Is When They Start Fighting
Inadequate manager called Chris*, muttering quietly to himself in different voices: You’re a hero, Chris. (pause) I know I am, Chris, I’m a real hero. (pause) Chris, I’m just the best.
Council Office
London
England
Except for Some Reason I Keep Getting Pregnant
Coworker: If I ever have a kid, I’m going to send them to Catholic school. I went to Catholic school and I feel I got a gooder education.
150 Batson Drive
Manchester, Connecticut
