Insurance agent on phone: Garbage? You said garbage? But if it’s garbage, why would you need to insure garbage??
East Little Creek Road
Norfolk, Virginia
Overheard by: kim
Archive for the ‘General Idiocy’ Category
3PM Snack Break
Co-worker: This place runs like a well-oiled banana.
3000 Mountain Creek Parkway
Dallas, Texas
…As This Powerpoint Diagram Very Clearly Illustrates.
Boss to underling: I'm okay with someone coming at me from the front. It's when they come from behind that bothers me.
Tysons Corner, Virginia
And They Always Get Grumpy When I Wear My “Go Palestininians!” Shirt.
Jewish executive: The CEO of [name] company is coming from Israel for negotiations.
Redneck executive (exasperated): I hate dealing with Israelis! They're the hardest people to negotiate with. They're never satisfied with any deal you work out.
Jewish executive: (silence)
Redneck executive: It's like water torture!
Peon: Um, I think that's the Chinese.
San Mateo, California
10AM Cancel New Headset Order
Employee: My headset for my phone doesn’t work. Can I have a new one?
Supervisor: Let me see that. Oh…you see what’s wrong? Sometimes the data can get caught in the phone line…so just straighten the cord. That makes the voice data come through more quickly and it won’t get all caught up.
11161 Mill Valley Road
Omaha, Nebraska
The Silver Lining
Assistant: Where are all the great shoe sales? I mean, after September 11th there were some great sales!
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Can’t believe she still works here
10AM Review
Worker: Can you review this for me?
Manager: Why are you asking me all the time?
Worker: Because you’re my team leader.
Manager: There are no team leaders anymore.
Worker: What? Yes, there are.
Manager: No, there aren’t.
Worker: Well, I asked [Jesse] yesterday, and he said he couldn’t do it because he wasn’t my team leader. Why would he say that if there aren’t team leaders anymore?
Manager: Because he didn’t want to do your review.
137 Iroquois Avenue
Essex Junction, Vermont
Ma'am, I Was Talking About a Commemorative Plaque
Woman to on cell: Hi, this is Susan Smith*. I was successful using a toothbrush so I don't need your help. Thanks for offering. Bye.
Glenview, Illinois
Overheard by: Jess
Geoge Washington Did Perm His Hair before Battle
Know-it-all peon: I swear, every invention in this world was invented for war. Highways, the Internet — everything! Don’t you read?
Lady peon: Okay, Eric*! What about perms? Hot rollers weren’t made for war!
Know-it-all peon: Perms aren’t inventions.
Lady peon: My ass, they aren’t!
Waterloo, Iowa
11AM Go Over Resumes
Manager: “…I was forced to take a year off work to look after my sick mother. She’s dead now so problem over.”
33 Paradise Road
Richmond, Surrey
UK