And of Course He Was There at the Time

Bimbo: She really didn’t betray him other than sleeping with someone else.

1300 Riverside Avenue
Fort Collins, Colorado

Overheard by: dazed and confused

…According to Some Estimates from the White House.

Leasing rep: Well, the girl was 14 and her mother’s 21! How is she going to learn anything with a mother like that? And the grandmother is only 32!

Randallstown, Maryland

Overheard by: tkap

Substantial Evidence of a Rocky Mountain High

20-something chick: Was it Colorado?
20-something dude: Yeah, that sounds right. There were a lot of unicorns.

Auburn, Massachusetts

9AM Back to Work

Supervisor: Okay, let me give you some advice. I’ve seen a lot of Lifetime movies, and–
Employee: You know, I think I gotta ask someone else about this. Thanks, though!

107 Jackson Street
Berea, Kentucky

For One Thing, There’ll Be Repercolations in the Foreign Markets

Boss: So what would be the wider business implamications of this?

Canberra
Australia

Overheard by: glad she wasn’t in that meeting

Gives a Mean Blowjob, Though

Coworker to another: My son got into GATE classes… He’s not even smart!

Orange County, California

That’s Not Baggage — Those Are Wedding Gifts

Suit hanging up phone: I am so done with married chicks — they have too much baggage.

3250 42^nd Street
New York, New York

What Do You Have to Do Around Here to Get Some Freaking Champagne?!

Employee: Can I help you find something?
Customer: I’m looking for a red wine.
Employee: Cabernet, pinot noir, shiraz?
Customer: No, I want a red wine.

1017 East Main Street
Radford, Virginia

…And Can I Do That from My Computer?

Worker: First, go to the website. [says URL]Customer: Do I need to go online first?

Maryland

Who’s One Beer Short of a Six-Pack

Bartender #1: How many beers are in a six-pack?
Bartender #2: I work with a fucking idiot.

Subiaco
Australia

Overheard by: I’m ordering wine