Warehouse manager to engineer: Hello, Vice President tight pants! (salutes)
Aliso Viejo, California
Archive for the ‘Engineers’ Category
I Translate His Words Into the Language Of Decent People
Female program manager: You got a sec?
Male program manager: I have lots of secs.
(pause)
Engineer: He means he has a lot of time.
Utah
Overheard by: Snickering Intern
And Don’t Start With Me About Beam Lube
Female architect to male engineer: I don’t care about the size of your beam, it’s not going to fit in this space I have!
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Office temp
Last Time We Tried That, We Wound Up with Our Heads Glued Together!
Engineer #1: So, Tom*, I’m going to need you to get me up to date on all of these projects before you leave.
Engineer #2: Yes, I think a Vulcan mind meld is the best option.
Hill Field, Utah
Overheard by: Snickering Intern
1PM Technical Advice
Engineer: Nasty letters always work!
315 Park Avenue South
New York, New York
Overheard by: Priscilla Perez
I’m Going to Call You Back Using a Fake British Accent
Engineer on phone: Hi, this is Jim from [Company A]. Oh, wait, that’s you. Shit.
Paterson, New Jersey
Dude, People Drink Out of That!
Office engineer #1: Why are you washing your hands in the water cooler?
Office engineer #2: Oh, I was playing with my dirty, failed parts.
Oil pump company
Claremore, Oklahoma
Overheard by: Tony
Butter Me Up If You Must
Guy engineer #1: Hey, want a muffin?
Guy engineer #2: Dude, you’re my muffin.
Guy engineer #1, in small voice: I feel uncomfortable now.
E. County Road
Wellington, Colorado
I Knew This Tiara Was a Bad Idea.
Engineer to operations guy: You’re all evil in this department. (points at administrative assistant) Especially you, you’re the leader.
Administrative assistant: What?
Manhattan, New York
Which Is Anything Involving Science
Engineer #1: July 21st – is that the equinox or the solstice? I always get the two mixed up.
Engineer #2 (home-schooled): I dunno… I don’t know anything about that satanic stuff.
Mississippi
