Manager handing name tag to an employee: These are the old name tags. We ordered new ones, but the courier who was delivering them fell off the train and died.
Ramat Gan
Israel
Overheard by: ayala
Archive for the ‘Employees’ Category
This Just In: Bon Jovi Fires Insurance Agent
Insurance agent on phone: Garbage? You said garbage? But if it’s garbage, why would you need to insure garbage??
East Little Creek Road
Norfolk, Virginia
Overheard by: kim
Not Why I Went to Law School, But What Are Ya Gonna Do?
Criminal defense attorney: Leave me alone. I have to get back to work.
Peon: Why is that?
Criminal defense attorney: I have a client that might actually be innocent.
39 South LaSalle Street
Chicago, Illinois
Why Gay Porn Stars Are So Healthy
Gay hairstylist: But people who have anal don't get prostrate cancer…
Manager: They only get hemorrhoids.
Gay hairstylist: That's true, after a while it looks like a cauliflower. But, anyway, we do not get prostate cancer, because the cock acts like a massage therapist.
Manager: Riiiiight!
Sao Paulo
Brazil
At Least, That’s What It Looks Like through the Keyhole
Older gentleman in response to memo on sexual harassment: In this office we don’t have sexual harassment, we just have sex!
Seguin, Texas
Which Is Why I'm Raising My Hand
Office worker: Where are the Doritos?
Cube mate: Huh?
Office worker: I said: “where are the Doritos?”
Cube mate: Oh, I thought you said: “where are the dirty hoes?”
Yardley, Pennsylvania
No, You’ve Just Got Those Little Wings on Your Lapel
Customer: By chance, was your mom a flight attendant?
Employee: Why, do you think you’re my dad?
Costa Mesa, California
Overheard by: Still laughing now
…About the Church Social Next Wednesday
Office worker: Lemme forward you this e-mail from slave whore Ella*!
BDSM Production Company
Long Beach, California
Overheard by: Joy
Plus, the Witch Is Always Trying to Trick Us into the Oven
Employee: First they stuff us with pie, then they expect us to work.
South Rainier
Seattle, Washington
Why the Frolicking Class is Always Booked
Gym employee: I have so much energy! I just want to frolic around naked!
1400 East 6th Street
Tucson, Arizona
Overheard by: dana