Archive for the ‘Employees’ Category

In Case You Were Won­der­ing What to Get Me for Boss­es’ Day

Male staffer: There may be a prob­lem.
Fe­male man­ag­er: With what?
Male staffer: I was just typ­ing an e‑mail about a birth cer­tifi­cate. Twice I typed “bitch” in­stead of “birth”.
Fe­male man­ag­er: Oooh!
Male staffer: I cor­rect­ed it be­fore I sent it, though.
Fe­male man­ag­er: Thank good­ness. (pause) Got­ta say, though, that I would love to have a bitch cer­tifi­cate. I mean, I do just fine with­out one, but it would be nice to have the for­mal recog­ni­tion.

Har­ris­burg, Penn­syl­va­nia

Over­heard by: Michael

He Got 500 Hours as Pun­ish­ment for Hav­ing Lisa Marie

Of­fice girl: My mom said she al­most wrecked her car the oth­er day be­cause she was watch­ing Elvis pick up trash on the side of the road. My mom said he was pick­ing up trash in his jump­suit, right there on the side of the road.
Of­fice guy: Elvis was do­ing a lit­tle com­mu­ni­ty ser­vice, was he?

Char­lotte, North Car­oli­na