Archive for the ‘Employees’ Category

I Know the Per­fect Po­si­tion For You!

Em­ploy­ee #1: I don’t know how you got a bet­ter re­view than you did last year.
Em­ploy­ee #2: Yeah, me ei­ther.
Em­ploy­ee #1: You know, I re­al­ly on­ly get about 50% out of you each day.
Em­ploy­ee #2: Yeah, that sounds about right. Some days more, some days less. Usu­al­ly less.
Em­ploy­ee #1: Would­n’t it be great if I got that 100% out of you, though?
Em­ploy­ee #2: Prob­a­bly, but I re­al­ly just don’t feel like it.

901 War­renville Road
Chica­go, Illi­nois

Over­heard by: Re­cov­er­ing Worka­holic

The Best Part Is, It Was a Ba­nana.

Cashier: Since this is a liq­ui­da­tion, all sales are fi­nal and there are no re­turns or ex­changes.
Cus­tomer: So if some­thing’s wrong with it, I can’t re­turn it?
Cashier: That’s right.
Cus­tomer: Okay.
Cus­tomer, af­ter item is paid for: So, I can re­turn this if it’s wrong?
Cashier, sigh­ing: You know what? Give it a whirl. Let me know how that goes.

Chica­go, Illi­nois