Archive for the ‘Dumb Employees’ Category

Why ‘American Government Conspiracy’ Will Always Be an Oxymoron

Intern #1: I will do all of your House bills if you get up and dance right now!
Intern #2: No.
Co-Worker: Why would you pay all of his house bills if he dances? That’s like $100!
Intern #1: House, like House of Representatives!
Co-Worker: We have access to the legislature’s power bills?

Political Office
Raleigh, North Carolina

Overheard by: Jason B.

Skipped School to Watch Monty Python

Office radio just played ‘High Hopes,’ by Frank Sinatra.

Flaky girl: What’s a ‘rubber tree plant’? Is it, like, a plant made of rubber, or a plant you get rubber from?
Yuppie girl: It’s a Rubber. Tree. Plant. So, like, a plant-tree.
Flaky girl: What’s that?
Yuppie girl: Like, a baby tree.
Flaky girl: So, a baby tree is a plant?
Yuppy girl: Well, it’s like how a baby duck is a duckling. It’s not really a duck.
Flaky girl: So, a baby is not really a human?
Yuppie girl: So it would be easy for the ant to move it.

St. Kilda Road
Melbourne, Victoria
Australia

Overheard by: I Dont Have Very High Hopes For These Two

Um, the Bras Are for My Wife

Cashier to customer: These are cute bras. I wish I had big boobs. Everyone says I should be happy with what I got, but I think I’d like big ones. [Customer stares silently.] Guys like big ones. Not saying yours are big or anything, but I wish I had your boobs.

2000 Barnett Shoals Road
Athens, Georgia