Archive for the ‘Dumb Employees’ Category

Skipped School to Watch Monty Python

Office radio just played ‘High Hopes,’ by Frank Sinatra.

Flaky girl: What’s a ‘rubber tree plant’? Is it, like, a plant made of rubber, or a plant you get rubber from?
Yuppie girl: It’s a Rubber. Tree. Plant. So, like, a plant-tree.
Flaky girl: What’s that?
Yuppie girl: Like, a baby tree.
Flaky girl: So, a baby tree is a plant?
Yuppy girl: Well, it’s like how a baby duck is a duckling. It’s not really a duck.
Flaky girl: So, a baby is not really a human?
Yuppie girl: So it would be easy for the ant to move it.

St. Kilda Road
Melbourne, Victoria
Australia

Overheard by: I Dont Have Very High Hopes For These Two

Um, the Bras Are for My Wife

Cashier to customer: These are cute bras. I wish I had big boobs. Everyone says I should be happy with what I got, but I think I’d like big ones. [Customer stares silently.] Guys like big ones. Not saying yours are big or anything, but I wish I had your boobs.

2000 Barnett Shoals Road
Athens, Georgia

12PM Order Pocket Dictionaries

Employee #1: How do you spell “who”?
Employee #2: How do you think it should be spelled? Sound it out.
Employee #1: H-O-W?
Employee #2: Does that sound right to you? Aren’t you like, 30 years old? And you can’t spell “who”?
Employee #1: You’re the one who told me to sound it out, bitch.

1818 Hillside Avenue
New Hyde Park, New York

Overheard by: Cathie